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Posted: February 11, 20152015-02-11T09:15:24+10:00 2015-02-11T09:15:24+10:00In: Public

In Barrow, Alaska, an up-and-coming oil executive struggles with damage control in the aftermath of a bizarre incident on a drilling barge that kills most of its crew, but when a primordial fungus brought up from under the ice begins to infect the local hospital staff, turning them into voracious sex fiends out to inject their spores, he abandons saving his career and fights to save his life.

Sick

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    12 Reviews

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    1. Richiev Singularity
      2015-02-11T13:00:43+10:00Added an answer on February 11, 2015 at 1:00 pm

      “When a primordial fungus infects his crew turning then into raging sex fiends, an up-and-coming Alaskan oil exec is forced to work with his scientist ex-wife to find a cure because at forty below zero, escape is not an option.”
      —–
      Title: Uncommon Cold

      Hope that helps, good luck with this!

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    2. Richiev Singularity
      2015-02-11T13:00:43+10:00Added an answer on February 11, 2015 at 1:00 pm

      “When a primordial fungus infects his crew turning then into raging sex fiends, an up-and-coming Alaskan oil exec is forced to work with his scientist ex-wife to find a cure because at forty below zero, escape is not an option.”
      —–
      Title: Uncommon Cold

      Hope that helps, good luck with this!

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    3. CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2015-02-11T16:40:11+10:00Added an answer on February 11, 2015 at 4:40 pm

      Combine some facts. It will make it read quicker. Something like “after an accident on a rig kills the crew and release a fungus that infects a local hospital…”. Plus Barlow is an unneeded fact. Unless it is super important to the story, like Paris or New York, drop it. Keep rewriting and refining it. Make it read quick, too much detail can bog it down. Only hit the big beats.

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    4. CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2015-02-11T16:40:11+10:00Added an answer on February 11, 2015 at 4:40 pm

      Combine some facts. It will make it read quicker. Something like “after an accident on a rig kills the crew and release a fungus that infects a local hospital…”. Plus Barlow is an unneeded fact. Unless it is super important to the story, like Paris or New York, drop it. Keep rewriting and refining it. Make it read quick, too much detail can bog it down. Only hit the big beats.

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    5. dpg Singularity
      2015-02-12T07:36:02+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 7:36 am

      I like Richiev’s take because it casts the oil exec as a hero trying to save others [stake characters], not merely a guy out to save his own life — other victims of the fungus be damned.

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    6. dpg Singularity
      2015-02-12T07:36:02+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 7:36 am

      I like Richiev’s take because it casts the oil exec as a hero trying to save others [stake characters], not merely a guy out to save his own life — other victims of the fungus be damned.

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    7. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2015-02-12T09:07:21+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 9:07 am

      I had a problem picking the genre of the story.

      When reading the logline in its current draft the first half of it describes an environmental corporate movie where as the second half describes a scifi natural disaster one. The combination and the timing in the read creates a jolt as the reader is preparing for one genre before the story changes to another very quickly.

      Well demonstrated by Richiev that the inciting incident needs to come first and the inciting incident is the fungus infection not the oil spill. This way the scifi natural disaster element informs the reader upfront what to expect as well as fulfil the function of a structured plot element.

      With mass infection type stories I find that the nature of the symptoms defines the genre as dramatic, horror or comic. I think that “…sex fiends out to inject their spores…” sounds comic/horror, is this the case?

      Hope this helps.

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    8. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2015-02-12T09:07:21+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 9:07 am

      I had a problem picking the genre of the story.

      When reading the logline in its current draft the first half of it describes an environmental corporate movie where as the second half describes a scifi natural disaster one. The combination and the timing in the read creates a jolt as the reader is preparing for one genre before the story changes to another very quickly.

      Well demonstrated by Richiev that the inciting incident needs to come first and the inciting incident is the fungus infection not the oil spill. This way the scifi natural disaster element informs the reader upfront what to expect as well as fulfil the function of a structured plot element.

      With mass infection type stories I find that the nature of the symptoms defines the genre as dramatic, horror or comic. I think that “…sex fiends out to inject their spores…” sounds comic/horror, is this the case?

      Hope this helps.

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    9. dpg Singularity
      2015-02-12T09:25:06+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 9:25 am

      I, too, wonder about the genre.

      >>>turning them into voracious sex fiends

      Would make a great hook for a comedy… but as a serious drama? What is the genre?

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    10. dpg Singularity
      2015-02-12T09:25:06+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2015 at 9:25 am

      I, too, wonder about the genre.

      >>>turning them into voracious sex fiends

      Would make a great hook for a comedy… but as a serious drama? What is the genre?

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    11. [Deleted User]
      2015-02-17T23:57:10+10:00Added an answer on February 17, 2015 at 11:57 pm

      Thank you all for your comments. Barrow, Alaska is important because it is such a unique location. This is a horror story and not a comedic one so I’ll need to rethink how to express it more darkly.

      Thank you all again.

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    12. [Deleted User]
      2015-02-17T23:57:10+10:00Added an answer on February 17, 2015 at 11:57 pm

      Thank you all for your comments. Barrow, Alaska is important because it is such a unique location. This is a horror story and not a comedic one so I’ll need to rethink how to express it more darkly.

      Thank you all again.

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