Logliner
Posted: 2019-06-03T22:32:01+10:00 In:

On the verge of taking his own life, a detective will have to get back on his feet to investigate the disappearance of his neglected daughter

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    5 Reviews

    1. Logliner

      What if he had been fired from his job, so no resources? Did the kidnapper send him a personal message – ie is her disappearance his fault from an old case? How old is his daughter?? Why is he suicidal – failed job, failed marriage? I think this can work with just more detail.

       

      A washed up divorced detective is forced into retirement until he discovers his estranged 15 year old daughter is missing and the police have no clues.? Maybe? Needs a greater obstacle I think…

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    2. Logliner

      Focus on finding the daughter because I guess that it is the main action in the film

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    3. Logliner

      THanks for your tips. Appreciate it.

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    4. Singularity

      Agree with Richiev.? There’s not enough meat on the bones of the plot.? It needs some fleshing out.? ?And the logline needs to be focus on the search for the dauther, not on the recovery.? Because finding his daughter is the objective goal;? overcoming his suicidal impulses is a necessary means to achieving that goal.

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    5. Singularity

      Your logline needs that; (One More Thing) but I don’t know what that one more thing happens to be.

      Unless the movie is actually 2 hours of the detective getting back on his feet before he can start his investigation.

      Personally, I would throw a few more rocks at the detective, not only is he suicidal but he must also do, the last thing in the world he wants to do.

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      “When his daughter disappears, a suicidal detective must (Do this thing he really doesn’t want to do) in order to find her.”

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