Logliner
Posted: 2016-08-04T14:53:31+10:00 In:

Oskar, an overlooked and bullied boy, finds love and revenge through Eli, a beautiful but peculiar girl.

Oskar, an overlooked and bullied boy, finds love and revenge through Eli, a beautiful but peculiar girl.
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    6 Reviews

    1. Again, put these in classics. And overlooked? By who and for what? Also for something like this I wouldn’t include character names unless it is a true story or a famous character, such as a comic book adaption.

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    2. Singularity

      Webdoitlive;

      FYI, ?the preferred practice is to post loglines for movies already made under “Classics”.

      And again, this is more of a blurb than a logline. ?Two different promotional techniques targeting two different markets.

       

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    3. Singularity

      Agreed with the above comments.

      Also no need for the character’s name in a logline unless it’s a historical or biopic.

      Check out the Training tab on the top bar, there’s more useful information there about logline best practice.

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    4. Logliner

      “Let the Right One In”

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    5. Samurai

      “Oskar, an overlooked and bullied boy, finds love and revenge through Eli, a beautiful but peculiar girl.”

      Hi wedoitlive,

      Your MC’s main course of action should be clear; what exactly does he do by finding love and revenge through this peculiar girl?

      And an inciting incident appears to be missing. So, he’s “bullied”; there must be a key setup you might’ve left out wherein some bully goes way too far and the MC decides enough is enough and takes action.

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    6. Singularity

      Bullied by who? Is there a specific event?

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