When a doctor learns he has a kill-mate, a stranger that will be triggered to kill him if they cross paths, he must plot their murder, or risk a deadly encounter.
Karel SegersLogliner
When a doctor learns he has a kill-mate, a stranger that will be triggered to kill him if they cross paths, he must plot their murder, or risk a deadly encounter.
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Why not flat out that they?are mutual kill-mates?? Both are triggered to kill each other. Two men enter the plot?– only one man leaves alive.??It’s seems to me to be implied. Why not just frame the story that way?
And if you really want to stir the plot, why not make one character a woman?? Make the pair?soul-mates — and kill-mates.? They love each other to death.
fwiw
I also want 1 main character. Both men being triggered to kill takes on the plot of a romance, where two people feel equal chemistry, therefore need equal screen time. You could argue that, but you get my point.
Okay, then why not both characters as women? ?(They are s-o-o-o underrepresented in films and get such lousy, stereotyped roles.) ?Having both as women could be an?element that ?makes this logline stand out, distinguish itself from the overwhelming number of stories oriented toward male main characters.
fwiw
The concept of a kill mate is too unexplained for me. Why does it happen. Is it possible to clarify that? Because it doesn’t pass the “just call the cops” test for me.
I believe the advantage of one characters being the kill-mate in the logline, is that the ‘big reveal’ at the end of the movie would be that the lead character was the kill-mate all along.
1: The lead character discovers he has a kill-mate
2: He’s skeptical but does research, finds instances of kill-mates
3: Something happens, and the lead character plot’s to kill the ‘kill mate’, before the kill-mate can kill him.
4: A voice of reason enters the story, possibly a love interest (b-story)
5: There are a couple false trails, he almost kills the wrong person
6: The lead character has doubts and begins to listen to the voice or reason
7: New evidence is given to him, he discovers exactly who the kill-mate is.
8: Now he seeks out the kill mate, to kill him before he is killed
9: Showdown! The fight is on
10: He wins and kills his kill-mate
11: His victory turns to ashes when the lead discovers he was the kill mate all along, the person he killed was an innocent (Possibly a whistle blower) who was trying to take down a big evil corporation.
12: (Tragedy ending) He is taken away and sent to the insane asylum the last glimpse we get of the lead character, he is in a padded room the door being shut.
12: (Happy-ish ending) He escapes the scene just as the police arrive. We cut to the CEO of the big evil corporation celebrating because he believes his plan has succeeded. We see the feet of a waiter entering the room, the camera pans up, we see the waiters pants and white jacket. The waiter is carrying a silver tray, under the silver tray is a gun. We pan up to finally reveal, it’s the lead character disguised as the waiter. We see the lead heading for the CEO in the middle of the room, FADE OUT
I have to say I prefer them both being ‘good’ people in society. I favour the antagonist being a whistleblower, but being an evil CEO that people would like to see dead just because of his socio-economic standing bores me a bit. Think of the wholesome people Walter White was willing to kill, he had us on the edge of our seats.
I like the mentor B plot part, I’ve always figured the MC to be newly married and maybe even have a kid on the way or have a young child at home, and he starts neglecting them to search for the killer.
Not sure about a twist ending, I’m not sure i have the writing chops to make it not sound like it’s a thriller circa 1998-2003.
I like the twist ending if the MC finds out he was the kill mate for the other person all along it would add a sens of irony that would elevate the concept as a whole.
Having them both as two Jo Shmoe’s ala’ Walter White could work, but making the target a big rich person and the MC a poor person provides the MC with greater obstacles on his way to get to his “kill-mate”. So for the sake of your plot it may be better to place them at different ends of the socioeconomic scale.