The Council of Blood: Wildfire
bondthewriterPenpusher
When a team of zombie fighting monsters loses their commander a rookie Griffin steps up to lead them through the horde of New York City so they can deliver an immune human to a secure location for testing.
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To me, this really isn’t jumping out. Making them monsters helps, but the basic story still feels cliched.
You know, the untested-rookie-gets-stuck-with-the-most-important-job sort of thing. The story of an immune human reminds me of countless other “the infected” stories (such as the film version of “I am Legend”).
As far as suggestions, maybe turn it into a comedy, satirizing these types of stories? Maybe, zombies get “infected” by human spit, which makes them back into normal people and it’s up to an “uninfectable” zombie to bite all the human spitters before he is destroyed.
I think, for the first time, I disagree with timmyelliot. I don’t think this logline’s problem is that the story is cliched – I’ve definitely never seen a story told from a Griffin’s perspective … is this thing gonna be like the Lion King meets Romero meets 16 Blocks? 🙂
I think the problem that you’ve got here is that (and I fall into this same trap) because the film is a fantasy, there’s a certain amount of information you think the audience needs to know to want to see the film. But what makes a film compelling enough to make is not (or at least shouldn’t be) the crazy creatures and effects, but the universal and relatable human story at the core. So what is it here?
A rookie Griffin (is there something better than rookie? Inexperienced? Eager? Be more specific with the flaw of this character) must escort humanity’s last best hope to a secure location through zombie infested New York … (before – what are the stakes? I get humanity is on the line, as it is in all zombie movies, but what are the stakes for your protagonist, considering he’s not human and it’s humans he’s trying to help?)
More great help! Thanks man! Yeah, cutting through the fantasy to the guts can be hard. I’m still fleshing out the actual story on this one, unlike the post-apocalyptic one that I’m 3 revised screenplays in on.
How would you describe a character that is trying to ‘clean’ his family name? Trying to make up for his father’s mistakes that have held him back in his culture. Because of the zombie problem (the monsters eat humans and the zombies may wipe the humans out) he’s given a slot on a strike force that he wouldn’t have normally got. In my FIRST stab at a log line for this I made reference to it but it just didn’t feel right.
“The night New York City loses containment on the Zombie outbreak, a rookie member of a Covert Monster Assault Team discovers the key to his family?s redemption only to find that the redemption is not worth the price.”
Again, thanks, you have provided some great insight into my loglines.