Not Another Hijack Movie
Rutger OosterhoffLogliner
When a White House security guard thinks he prevented a Boeing 747 from crashing in to the White House, by killing a supposed hijacker (in front of him) that whispers Allahoe akbar, he is accused of first degree murder and sentences to death. Franz Kafka’s "Der Prozess" meets ?
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I think there are some holes in the credibility of the premise.
I suggest you research the U.S. law on what constitutes 1st degree murder, as well as how/when the death penalty in the U.S. is applied.
Also, I suggest you research the rigorous screening and training procedures for Secret Service personnel, which by definition, is what a White House security guard is. Not just anyone looking for a job can work in the Secret Service.
Also, even though he’s in the Secret Service, it doesn’t entitle him to carry a gun on a commercial plane. Only U.S. marshals are allowed to. (And how did he clear through the security screening?) With one exception: when members of the First Family, or ex-Presidents (who are entitled to secret service protection) travel on commercial flights, then the agent with them can pack heat.
So your scenario would have be setup with that one exception. But then there is still the legal issues of what constitutes 1st degree and how/when the death penalty is applied in the US of A.
Thanks DGP, I guess it indead will not be Another Hijack Movie – haha.
If you do find a way around the plot holes DPG stated and create a credible way for the agent to get a gun on the plane, the structure and wording of the logline could use some tweaking.
The MC’s motivations for suspecting the individual could be cut, I think best to jump strait to the inciting incident which seams to be the death sentence. As a result of this he has to work very hard to save his life.
Hope this helps.
As described in the logline, it is highly unlikely he would be charged with 1st degree murder in a U.S. Court, even more unlikely that he would get the death penalty.
OK, thanks guys.
You’re correct. First degree is reserved for premeditated acts. There is definitely death penalty for federal crimes. You should research “hate crimes”. In the USA sex and racial motivated crimes do carry bigger penalties. He may not be a racist, doesn’t stop the prosecution from saying her is.
Security guard / secret service may be a push. There are a number of staff, such as guides, that may take the law into their own hands.
I do like the idea of someone doing something they believe is for the greater good and getting punished for it.
It’s “Kafka” so I don’t think the credibility or realism is a problem at all. Kafka trial is a nightmare where a man is accused of NOTHING and sentenced to death just because he refuses to defend himself. The problem I see here is that I can?t see the whole movie in the logline : too much details about the initial killing and no clues about what HAPPENS in the middle of the movie. If it?s really kafka? that you want to track, you should stress the paradox in the situation as much as you can. Something like A honest but ingenuous security guard kills a terrorist and save the White House, only to find he will be treated as a terrorist and nailed in a kafkian trial?.
Thanks FFF, yes it’s much to basic, especially as a thriller. I try to have original concepts, but I have to think them through more before I post them!! Just deleted my last idea. Did not make sence. An idea is often as good as oher people think it is; that’s if you want to sell it. By the way, selling loglines is a fable. You sell completed scripts, not basic ideas. That’s why – for me- the most important thing on this forum is to learn and have fun!!
Later on I’m going to focus again on the Kafkanion (new word?) paradox.
Thanks again