Penpusher
Posted: 2013-07-08T22:02:40+10:00 In:

When a woman from another planet falls down from the sky, A father who has lost his wife and son, helps the woman get back to where she came from.

Look up

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    8 Reviews

    1. Samurai

      Great point dpg…all the logline needs imo.

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    2. Singularity

      Oh, and in E.T., getting back to the home planet is a matter of life and death. There are no such stakes in “Look Up”.

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    3. Singularity

      Correction:
      So in both stories, the protagonist is tasked with rising to the challenge of rescuing someone.

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    4. Singularity

      Re: E.T.
      Elliott, the boy, is the protagonist.

      E.T. is the stakes character, the one who will die if Elliott doesn’t find the courage to help him escape the authorities [antagonist] and return to his planet.

      And the way I read the logline for “Look Up”, the widower is the protagonist, the woman is the stakes character.

      So in both stories, the protagonist are tasked with rising to the challenge of rescuing someone.

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    5. Samurai

      Who’s the protagonist in E.T?

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    6. Thanks for the feedback guys. I’m pretty new to loglines. My story would be told from thee mans perspective.

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    7. Penpusher

      I like the idea but i think that you need to have a think about who the lead character is? Is it the woman who falls from the sky or the father whose lost his wife and son?
      If its the father whose journey it is i would suggest changing the loglien around to reflect this.
      Something like ‘A man whose recently lost his wife and son discovers a woman whose fallen from the sky and must…”
      I think this will help correct you’re p.o.v problem and help you assess what the main goal of the two chracters really are

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    8. Singularity

      Why does help her (other than simple human decency)?
      What’s the stakes — what does he stand to lose if he fails?
      What’s the obstacle and/or antagonist that prevents her from getting back to her home planet?

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