When a woman with incorruptible morals is targeted as an employee by gangsters her honesty and integrity are challenged when her beloved employees pull off the crime of the century.
JoLogliner
When a woman with incorruptible morals is targeted as an employee by gangsters her honesty and integrity are challenged when her beloved employees pull off the crime of the century.
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You give us two inciting incidents. I would start with the heist and then tell about the moral dilemma
I think this concept has potential for plenty of comedy — and it would also work as a straight drama — but I suggest??it needs to be more specific.
So, for example:
When gangsters?kidnap a? bank teller’s children because they think she has electronically looted their Swiss banks accounts, she has 48 hours to find the real culprits and?return the money to save her children’s lives.
(35 words)
Notes:
In this version finding out?that?the culprits are ?her colleagues would be the Big Reveal.? And a good one for the story, but in my judgment, not necessary for the logline.
That’s she’s of impeachable morale rectitude is also a good story element, but in the interest of brevity, I deem it?optional ?for a logline.? The hook of the story is not her?impeachable character but that she’s an innocent and utterly clueless person? who becomes the gangsters prime suspect.
And I added the ticking clock because that always amps up urgency, dramatic tension.
Anyway, I think the concept has legs.?Run with it.? Best wishes.