When Langa’s father is crippled financially, Langa’s life takes an about-turn and she struggles to elevate herself to the heights of success using her singing talent.
GeraldLogliner
When Langa’s father is crippled financially, Langa’s life takes an about-turn and she struggles to elevate herself to the heights of success using her singing talent.
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“When her father is crippled…” Now we have a strong inciting incident. This is a good opener!
One of the problems with this is, people don’t make money following their dreams of stardom.
As a result, when trouble happens, they are usually forced to get a day job to pay the bills.
So in the real world, if her father is crippled and she must become the breadwinner, then she would be forced to get ‘a real job’
The conflict would be trying to take care of her family while still holding onto her dreams.
In your logline, her father is crippled so she pursues her singing career. This, (if not handled correctly) will seem kind of selfish.
Why is she pursuing her dream of stardom while her father is crippled?
It is hard to take care of your family when you are a starving artist.