Protectors Of The Species
Alan SmitheePenpusher
When problematic space undercover cop on Earth discovers a monstrous plot to invade the Earth must confront the invaders who destroyed his planet in order to save the human race and the human woman he loves.
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It’s very good to have descriptions of the MC’s flaw and occupation in the logline however I think it is over done in this case.
As it is now, there are 3 adjectives pre occupation in the logline “…problematic space undercover…”. Each add an entirely different type of characteristic with out a compound effect to each other to the MC perhaps best to simply the description to the bare necessary one.
Also to help sharpen the action the MC will pursue throughout the story better to specify one antagonist rather than an army of them.
When a rogue alien cop discovers a plot to invade Earth he must fight the psychotic leader of the invading race in order to save the earthling woman he loves.
It’s very good to have descriptions of the MC’s flaw and occupation in the logline however I think it is over done in this case.
As it is now, there are 3 adjectives pre occupation in the logline “…problematic space undercover…”. Each add an entirely different type of characteristic with out a compound effect to each other to the MC perhaps best to simply the description to the bare necessary one.
Also to help sharpen the action the MC will pursue throughout the story better to specify one antagonist rather than an army of them.
When a rogue alien cop discovers a plot to invade Earth he must fight the psychotic leader of the invading race in order to save the earthling woman he loves.
Thank you.
Thank you.