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savinh0Samurai
Posted: February 8, 20172017-02-08T20:25:28+10:00 2017-02-08T20:25:28+10:00In: Romance

When she meets her old flame at a student reunion abroad, an engaged CEO must decide whether to cancel the wedding for the affair and move to a foreign country without any safety.

When she meets her old flame at a student reunion abroad, an engaged CEO must decide whether to cancel the wedding for the affair and move to a foreign country without any safety.
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    3 Reviews

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    1. CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2017-02-08T20:39:47+10:00Added an answer on February 8, 2017 at 8:39 pm

      Your story is a single question. Tells us everything around the decision.

      Here red is my take on Titanic, it may help.

      desparate to escape her abusive fiance a bankrupt heiress falls in love with a penniless artist on board Titanc.

      Gives you back story and motives. ?No doubt in your story, but not evident in your logline.

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    2. Richiev Singularity
      2017-02-10T06:55:37+10:00Added an answer on February 10, 2017 at 6:55 am

      The logline is missing the hook. The logline needs that ‘one extra thing’ that makes the story stand out.

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    3. dpg Singularity
      2017-02-12T12:52:25+10:00Added an answer on February 12, 2017 at 12:52 pm

      Agree with Richiev.

      What if the old flame she meets at the class reunion after becoming engaged to a man is…. a girl?

      (Why not? ?Complicated bixsexual relationships are a fact of life. ?And thanks to the greater acceptance of ?the LGBT community, it’s no longer a totally taboo subject.)

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