Penpusher
Posted: 2018-06-23T04:48:57+10:00 In:

When the ultimate betrayal comes to surface, 8 friends will become enemies and only 1 will be left standing.

When the ultimate betrayal comes to surface, 8 friends will become enemies and only 1 will be left standing.
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    7 Reviews

    1. Samurai

      8 friends will become enemies with the betrayer or each other? It’s just mush.

      • 0
    2. Singularity

      “Ultimate betrayal ” is vague.? What does that mean?

      And the logline also contains a spoiler; it gives away the ending (only 1 will survive). That is something a logline should never do.

      • 0
    3. Samurai

      Hi Kathryn,

      As variable said earlier, this is a tagline for a movie, not a logline.

      As a logline it’s incredibly vague. You could describe a crime thriller in vein of Reservoir dogs or a high school comedy where 8 friends are vying for the same guy for example.

      Until we get more details, it will be difficult to help you develop the concept or improve on the logline.

      • 0
    4. Singularity

      If the betrayal is a big reveal at the end of the movie, then it is true, you should not reveal?it in the logline.

      However,?we still need a specific event in the logline that sets the story in motion.

      • 0
    5. Penpusher

      Thanks for the feedback. If I tell you what it is then it spoils the plot of the movie. I tell you enough to peak your curiosity which proves my point.

      • 0
    6. Uberwriter

      Some questions pop to mind –
      1. Who betrays whom?
      2. Who’s your protagonist?
      3. What was the nature of betrayal? &
      4. ..As a result of which, what becomes the protagonist’s GOAL

      PS. If you are aiming to write for multiple protagonist’s, the link below might be helpful:
      https://loglines.org/logline/how-to-write-a-story-with-multiple-protagonists/

      Good Luck!!

      • 0
    7. Singularity

      Since the betrayal is what sets the story in motion you should be more specific about what it is.

      • 0