When an introverted waitress falls in love, she must seek out the man of her dreams, learning to overcome her fear of rejection.

Try to focus about what is unique in your story. There must be something very specific and original, or an original combination of known elements to boost the concept.

I presume the logline means to say that an introverted waitress falls in love with?a man and now she must find the psychological wherewithal to?dare pursue him despite the downside of rejection. ?(Being an introvert, she's? probably sending out signals to weak for him to pick up.)

Well, as life long, card-carrying introvert, I can sympathize with that predicament.? But that's?the?problem I see in? the logline: it lays out a predicament -- but not a plot.?

Overcoming her fear of rejection is certainly her subjective need.? But, once again, loglines are about objective goals, not subjective needs.??A logline?ought to describe what a?character outwardly and actively does, not about what?she inwardly need to learn.

I emphasize" outwardly" because film is a?an audio/?visual medium.? We? have can only know about what's going on inside of characters heads by what they do on the outside, what they?say (dialogue) ?and do (action).

So, as a result of falling in love, what becomes the woman's objective goal?? What's her specific game plan to win the man's attention and affection?? What must she do in spite of? her introversion?

How?can she turn?her perceived "character flaw" in her favor, prove that it is an asset not a liability?? I have reservations about calling a "character flaw";? I consider it a strength, but,? tragically,?we introverts?have to?live?in a world where we are unfairly?outnumbered by extroverts, where extroverts have rigged the rules in their favor.

Anyway, I want to root for the character, but I'm not sure what I'm rooting for her to accomplish. In other words, I don't what the plot is.

fwiw

I presume the logline means to say that an introverted waitress falls in love with?a man and now she must find the psychological wherewithal to?dare pursue him despite the downside of rejection. ?(Being an introvert, she's? probably sending out signals to weak for him to pick up.)

Well, as life long, card-carrying introvert, I can sympathize with that predicament.? But that's?the?problem I see in? the logline: it lays out a predicament -- but not a plot.?

Overcoming her fear of rejection is certainly her subjective need.? But, once again, loglines are about objective goals, not subjective needs.??A logline?ought to describe what a?character outwardly and actively does, not about what?she inwardly need to learn.

I emphasize" outwardly" because film is a?an audio/?visual medium.? We? have can only know about what's going on inside of characters heads by what they do on the outside, what they?say (dialogue) ?and do (action).

So, as a result of falling in love, what becomes the woman's objective goal?? What's her specific game plan to win the man's attention and affection?? What must she do in spite of? her introversion?

How?can she turn?her perceived "character flaw" in her favor, prove that it is an asset not a liability?? I have reservations about calling a "character flaw";? I consider it a strength, but,? tragically,?we introverts?have to?live?in a world where we are unfairly?outnumbered by extroverts, where extroverts have rigged the rules in their favor.

Anyway, I want to root for the character, but I'm not sure what I'm rooting for her to accomplish. In other words, I don't what the plot is.

fwiw