


Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
When allegations prompt a rising Senior to permanently leave home, he must feign loyalty to a commune that hides him so he can attain residency there and take his GED.
>>The situation I?ve set up is he had to feign interest in joining the group, which is a borderline cult. The promise of the premise is watching him fake >>>interest, first because he needs to hide there, and later to maintain residency.Two observations: 1] It seems to me that the ploRead more
>>The situation I?ve set up is he had to feign interest in joining the group, which is a borderline cult. The promise of the premise is watching him fake >>>interest, first because he needs to hide there, and later to maintain residency.
Two observations:
1] It seems to me that the plot (hence the logline) begins when he enters the commune. ?The other events constitute backstory to be revealed as necessary in the script.
2] IMHO: ?it would be more dramatically interesting if he wasn’t feigning interest, if he initially swallowed the cult, hook, line and sinker. ?Only to eventually realize, it’s not the right answer to the dramatic question his struggle poses. ?So then ?he has to grow out of it.
Frankly, I believe your portrait of his troubled past makes him a prime candidate for being suckered into the physical comforts and spiritual solace of a cult-commune. ?I mean what his his character flaw if not being emotionally vulnerable to something like that? ?It seems to me you’re making it too easy for the teen enter and eventually exit the commune.
fwiw
See lessWhen allegations prompt a rising Senior to permanently leave home, he must feign loyalty to a commune that hides him so he can attain residency there and take his GED.
So what complication does living in the commune create to threaten his objective goal? Seems like he's found what he needs, a ?surrogate family, a solution to his survival problem.
So what complication does living in the commune create to threaten his objective goal? Seems like he’s found what he needs, a ?surrogate family, a solution to his survival problem.
See lessWhen allegations prompt a rising Senior to permanently leave home, he must feign loyalty to a commune that hides him so he can attain residency there and take his GED.
And what's at stake? ?To prove he's innocent? ?Or to get his GED? ?(For all the effort he expends dodging the allegation, getting the GED seems to be a dramatic non sequitur -- and rather paltry potatoes.)I don't comprehend what the primary issue the story will explore. ?Is fleeing from the allegatiRead more
And what’s at stake? ?To prove he’s innocent? ?Or to get his GED? ?(For all the effort he expends dodging the allegation, getting the GED seems to be a dramatic non sequitur — and rather paltry potatoes.)
I don’t comprehend what the primary issue the story will explore. ?Is fleeing from the allegation a plot setup to explore what it’s like to be involved in a cult-like-commune? ?Or is fleeing from the allegation a plot setup to work out how a character eventually matures and faces up to his past? ?What is the story really about?
See less