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  1. Posted: February 6, 2015In: Public

    Veil of a Dream is a character-driven drama about an emotionally unstable teenager who must battle the torment of his manipulative friends, his scarred past, and his own haunted mind as he pursues a desire for love.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 8, 2015 at 1:55 pm

    >>he pursues a desire for love. Too general. All (normal) humans pursue a desire for love. A plot needs a specific love interest. And specific stakes. What does he stand to lose if he fails to win her affection? What does he stand to gain if he succeeds? And his manipulative "friends" must be framedRead more

    >>he pursues a desire for love.

    Too general. All (normal) humans pursue a desire for love. A plot needs a specific love interest. And specific stakes. What does he stand to lose if he fails to win her affection? What does he stand to gain if he succeeds? And his manipulative “friends” must be framed in the logline (and the story) as an obstacle, as a major complication to his objective goal, more than a tangential aggravation.

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  2. Posted: February 8, 2015In: Public

    trapped behind enemy lines two soldiers must escape with a hostage that is playing them against each other.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 8, 2015 at 1:31 pm

    How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don't but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating? And if he is able to manipulate them, thRead more

    How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don’t but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating?

    And if he is able to manipulate them, that would seem to make him a more interesting and compelling character than the 2 soldiers.

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  3. Posted: February 8, 2015In: Public

    trapped behind enemy lines two soldiers must escape with a hostage that is playing them against each other.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 8, 2015 at 1:31 pm

    How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don't but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating? And if he is able to manipulate them, thRead more

    How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don’t but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating?

    And if he is able to manipulate them, that would seem to make him a more interesting and compelling character than the 2 soldiers.

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    • 0
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      • Share on LinkedIn
      • Share on WhatsApp
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