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Against opposition from her family, and his mentor, a graduate from Mongolia and her Russian pen-pal, who are otherwise too poor to go away to school, road-test their courage and their friendship by joining other students and staff to launch their new floating campus aboard the Rainbow Warriors International University
Who/what is the antagonist that threatens to defeat them? What is the character flaw whereby the main characters may defeat themselves?
Who/what is the antagonist that threatens to defeat them?
See lessWhat is the character flaw whereby the main characters may defeat themselves?
Against opposition from her family, and his mentor, a graduate from Mongolia and her Russian pen-pal, who are otherwise too poor to go away to school, road-test their courage and their friendship by joining other students and staff to launch their new floating campus aboard the Rainbow Warriors International University
As I noted earlier, your logline seems to have 2 plots: 1] The struggle to get where ever they need to go to join the university; 2] The struggle to get the "floating campus" going after they arrive. But a logline should have only one plot. What you seem to have is the basis for two movies, not one.Read more
As I noted earlier, your logline seems to have 2 plots: 1] The struggle to get where ever they need to go to join the university; 2] The struggle to get the “floating campus” going after they arrive.
But a logline should have only one plot.
What you seem to have is the basis for two movies, not one. Or a series with X-number of chapters. What is your target medium and format: a regular movie or a TV/streaming media serial?
Either way, the logline should be about the principal character(s) having one overarching objective goal. That objective goal would be the basis for a single plot line that unifies all the individual episodes and chapters.
Consider the plot for the epic movie “Lawrence of Arabia” (1962). The movie is nearly 4 hours long (director’s cut) — they don’t make movies like that anymore. If such a sweeping story in length and scope were being made today it would be a multi-chapter TV/streaming series.
Anyway, at first viewing the movie might seem to have 2 plots, divided by an intermission. The first plot would seem to be about Lawrence struggle to capture the strategic port of Aqaba from the Ottoman Turks during World War I. The second plot would seem to be about Lawrence’s fight to defeat the Turks altogether in Arabia and get to Damascus before the British army does.
But actually, Lawrence is motivated by one uber-goal which he explicitly articulates in the setup: Liberate the Arabs from both the Ottoman and British empires. And that’s the overarching dramatic question of the entire 4 hour movie: Can Lawrence realize his dream of winning the Arabs their freedom?
That becomes the basis for the unifying plot line of the entire movie.
What is the single uber-goal, the unitary, unifying plot line for your story?
(And once again, don’t assume that a script reader or producer will automatically know what Rainbow Warriors refers to. Most won’t.
Also, are you aware of the controversy surrounding the prophecy? That many Native Americans consider it to be bogus, a White Man fabrication co-opting Native American themes and concepts? These days, Hollyweird is more sensitive to how Native Americans and their culture and traditions are portrayed in cinema.
I’m just saying, fwiw…)
See lessAgainst opposition from her family, and his mentor, a graduate from Mongolia and her Russian pen-pal, who are otherwise too poor to go away to school, road-test their courage and their friendship by joining other students and staff to launch their new floating campus aboard the Rainbow Warriors International University
As I noted earlier, your logline seems to have 2 plots: 1] The struggle to get where ever they need to go to join the university; 2] The struggle to get the "floating campus" going after they arrive. But a logline should have only one plot. What you seem to have is the basis for two movies, not one.Read more
As I noted earlier, your logline seems to have 2 plots: 1] The struggle to get where ever they need to go to join the university; 2] The struggle to get the “floating campus” going after they arrive.
But a logline should have only one plot.
What you seem to have is the basis for two movies, not one. Or a series with X-number of chapters. What is your target medium and format: a regular movie or a TV/streaming media serial?
Either way, the logline should be about the principal character(s) having one overarching objective goal. That objective goal would be the basis for a single plot line that unifies all the individual episodes and chapters.
Consider the plot for the epic movie “Lawrence of Arabia” (1962). The movie is nearly 4 hours long (director’s cut) — they don’t make movies like that anymore. If such a sweeping story in length and scope were being made today it would be a multi-chapter TV/streaming series.
Anyway, at first viewing the movie might seem to have 2 plots, divided by an intermission. The first plot would seem to be about Lawrence struggle to capture the strategic port of Aqaba from the Ottoman Turks during World War I. The second plot would seem to be about Lawrence’s fight to defeat the Turks altogether in Arabia and get to Damascus before the British army does.
But actually, Lawrence is motivated by one uber-goal which he explicitly articulates in the setup: Liberate the Arabs from both the Ottoman and British empires. And that’s the overarching dramatic question of the entire 4 hour movie: Can Lawrence realize his dream of winning the Arabs their freedom?
That becomes the basis for the unifying plot line of the entire movie.
What is the single uber-goal, the unitary, unifying plot line for your story?
(And once again, don’t assume that a script reader or producer will automatically know what Rainbow Warriors refers to. Most won’t.
Also, are you aware of the controversy surrounding the prophecy? That many Native Americans consider it to be bogus, a White Man fabrication co-opting Native American themes and concepts? These days, Hollyweird is more sensitive to how Native Americans and their culture and traditions are portrayed in cinema.
I’m just saying, fwiw…)
See less