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After his prizefighter abandons him, an oldfashioned trainer takes on a stubborn woman to train her for a championship challenge.
An interesting choice, Nir Shelter.I am inclined to think this is a film where there is a bifurcation in the plot in that one character "owns" the objective goal and another character "owns" the subjective character arc.It seems to me that Maggie, the female fighter, owns the objective goal.? It's hRead more
An interesting choice, Nir Shelter.
I am inclined to think this is a film where there is a bifurcation in the plot in that one character “owns” the objective goal and another character “owns” the subjective character arc.
It seems to me that Maggie, the female fighter, owns the objective goal.? It’s her Big Dream , one that she has to persuade a reluctant Frankie? to help? her achieve.? (In dialectical contrast, it’s Frankie who suffers from the Big Nightmare:? he remains haunted by what he did while coaching “Scrap”, the narrator; that is, going against his better judgement he let “Scrap”, continue to a fight resulting in Scrap losing his vision in one eye which KO’ed his boxing career.)
Maggie has to persuade Frankie to take her on, to help her achieve her objective goal.? Around the MPR,? going for a championship game is her objective.? She has to persuade him again to? overcome his reservations (because of his Big Nightmare).
Maggie is a constant character in that, unlike Frankie, she has no reservations, she never wavers in literally fighting for her objective goal, in making her Big Dream come true — until the last act after? ?a cheap shot taken by her opponent in the championship fight, renders her permanently paralyzed from the neck down.
In contrast, Frankie is the one who has the strongest character arc.? He’s the one who has to change his opinion about women fighting, the character who, ultimately, has to confront the greatest moral dilemma.
Because of this bifurcation, I’m inclined to see this a plot dual protagonist.? Also because, imho,? the relationship between the two is the most interesting dynamic in the film.
Now, then.? for the logline, I am inclined to? drop the event of the manager losing his male prizefighter.? It’s not the inciting incident.? Thee inciting incident? is Maggie approaching Frankie, asking him to train her.? A “Call to Adventure”? which, of course, he refuses to accept.
Finally, one could apply an adjective phrase that describes her defining characteristic/strength which her case is stubborn determination.? But I am inclined to describe her in terms of her undeserved fortune plus an attribute about a liability — one that adds some savory bait to the story hook:? her age.
So:
A 30 year old woman trapped in a dead end job persuades an old school boxing manager to train her to become a championship contender.
(25? words)
Whatever, I would definitely nix the term “collaborate”.? Boxing managers don’t collaborate; they coach, they train.
fwiw
See lessWhen he?s enslaved by aliens, a New York mob boss must rally his fellow prisoners, take over the spaceship and teach his captors; even in space, the mob rules.
>>>It?s also a comedy because they are the stereotypical gangsters of that time. What would have worked for describing him? I suggest reclassifying it as a comedy because it more accurately conveys the sensibility. What kind of black market is he to be sold on?? A violent gangster is goingRead more
>>>It?s also a comedy because they are the stereotypical gangsters of that time. What would have worked for describing him?
I suggest reclassifying it as a comedy because it more accurately conveys the sensibility.
What kind of black market is he to be sold on?? A violent gangster is going to be temperamentally unfit to submit to servitude as a slave.? Of all the people that could be abducted, why would aliens abduct him?
See lessWhen he?s enslaved by aliens, a New York mob boss must rally his fellow prisoners, take over the spaceship and teach his captors; even in space, the mob rules.
Cut to the chase:? the mob boss's objective goal is to escape back to earth.And why would an audience want to root for a violent mob boss?? Maybe his abduction is cosmic karma, payback, for all his crimes on earth.
Cut to the chase:? the mob boss’s objective goal is to escape back to earth.
And why would an audience want to root for a violent mob boss?? Maybe his abduction is cosmic karma, payback, for all his crimes on earth.
See less