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An opinionated former cult-member must convince his equally-opinionated family to leave the same cult before they commit the ultimate sacrifice – themselves. TITLE: Born to Die
At 22 words, the logline is succinct.? But, alas, it lacks an inciting incident.? What has happened that makes it a matter of? life-or-death NOW that he must convince his family to leave the cult? (For that matter, why did he leave?? Why isn't he still deluded like his family? Have you worked that oRead more
At 22 words, the logline is succinct.? But, alas, it lacks an inciting incident.? What has happened that makes it a matter of? life-or-death NOW that he must convince his family to leave the cult?
(For that matter, why did he leave?? Why isn’t he still deluded like his family? Have you worked that out?? That’s not an essential aspect for the purpose of the logline, but I suggest it is an essential aspect of the protagonist’s character in the script.? And I am frankly curious because in my foolish and emotionally vulnerable youth I came under the influence of a religious cult. And? I have mulled over a lot why the arguments that brought me to my senses failed to persuade others..? Which is why I think? “opinionated” misses the mark in describing the family.? The problem with the family is that they are deluded.)
fwiw
See lessAfter the arrival of talkies, a declining star produces another silent film to prove his pride, while the rising career of an actress he loves keep them apart
My take (but I think it's clunky):When the talkies arrive, a proud star's career sinks as he persists in making silent films while the career of his protege/girlfriend soars with sound. (25 words)Specifically, the silent star's objective goal is to make another silent movie even though everyone elseRead more
My take (but I think it’s clunky):
When the talkies arrive, a proud star’s career sinks as he persists in making silent films while the career of his protege/girlfriend soars with sound.
(25 words)
Specifically, the silent star’s objective goal is to make another silent movie even though everyone else has embraced talkies.?Artistically it may the right goal for him? because he doesn’t think he can make a go of it in talkies. (This is an echo of actual film history when many silent star’s careers ended because they just didn’t have the voice to make the transition to talkies.)
So, in the 1st half of the 2nd Act he finances another silent film out of his own pocket.? But financially, of course, it’s the wrong objective goal.? The movie bombs (midpoint reversal) and in the 2nd half he loses everything and is abandoned by everyone while the love interest’s career soars higher and higher.
BTW:? that’s how the systole and diastole of drama beats:? if the protagonist achieves his objective goal by the midpont, then it’s a “false victory” and/ or the wrong goal.
See lessEdit: A teenage boy transforms into a girl overnight when he meets his soulmate. He must find a solution to live with her again meanwhile she turns into a boy.
An interesting concept but:1] Why a fictional post-ap world when you can have a similar romantic situation arise now in the real world with transsexual people?2] The logline sets up a situation but not a complete plot.? As a result of their falling in love, what dramatic problem does it create?? ?WhRead more
An interesting concept but:
1] Why a fictional post-ap world when you can have a similar romantic situation arise now in the real world with transsexual people?
2] The logline sets up a situation but not a complete plot.? As a result of their falling in love, what dramatic problem does it create?? ?What’s the dramatic goal to solve the dramatic problem?
See less