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  1. Posted: February 16, 2018In: Drama

    After a selfish, irresponsible, 18 year old’s father is framed and she is given his hyper- intelligent OCD son (11) to look after, she must fool Social Services into believing she is responsible enough to care for the boy, or outwit a crime syndicate into negotiating her father?s release before the boy is removed from her care.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 17, 2018 at 1:57 am

    The logline seems to give the protagonist and either/or choice of two possible objective goals.? ?Based on previous iterations of the concept, I'm? guessing you still want to juggle both in the script:? the girl must deceive Social Services while simultaneously springing her father.But you have to fRead more

    The logline seems to give the protagonist and either/or choice of two possible objective goals.? ?Based on previous iterations of the concept, I’m? guessing you still want to juggle both in the script:? the girl must deceive Social Services while simultaneously springing her father.

    But you have to frame the dramatic plot in terms of one– and only one– primary objective goal in the logline (and script).

    So if her primary objective goal is to maintain custody of her brother, then freeing her father is a complication. If her primary objective goal is to free her father, then the custody of her brother is a complication.

    Please note that I’m not saying? you must drop one of the story lines entirely from the script proper.? (Although I myself prefer the child custody story line.)? You just have to decide which one is the more important, the one that embodies your overarching theme, your dramatic purpose.?

    Which is…?? What is your story really about?? What is your theme?

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  2. Posted: February 17, 2018In: Action

    When her daughter is kidnapped at a local convenience store, Midge Phaeton must bring the sex trafficking to its knees, but when she is caught, and beaten to a pulp, she must outsmart the traffickers in order to save her daughter from being exploited or killed.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 17, 2018 at 1:43 am

    So what's the dramatic problem?? I don't see any conflict, any tension in this setup. What's the inciting incident?? What dramatic problem does the inciting incident create?? Who is the protagonist?? What is the protagonist's objective goal?

    So what’s the dramatic problem?? I don’t see any conflict, any tension in this setup.

    What’s the inciting incident?? What dramatic problem does the inciting incident create?? Who is the protagonist?? What is the protagonist’s objective goal?

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  3. Posted: February 15, 2018In: Biography

    As his best friend – an alcoholic old Hollywood star – begs for death, a young reporter sees his own fate and takes a dramatic step to rewrite the story of his life.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 15, 2018 at 8:27 pm

    As the others have said. The logline is slotted in the Biography genre.? So does that mean it's based on the real life of an alcoholic Hollywood star?? (If so, who?)? Or is it a fictional character?? If it's fictional,?then it's not a biography.

    As the others have said.

    The logline is slotted in the Biography genre.? So does that mean it’s based on the real life of an alcoholic Hollywood star?? (If so, who?)? Or is it a fictional character?? If it’s fictional,?then it’s not a biography.

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