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Falling in love while helping a cat woman return to her Earth alone leaves an insular college student struggling to maintain his belief in her and find a way through the gateway.
As Richiev said, it's difficult to figure out what the plot of the story is. The falling in love seems to be the "B" story, what happens after he decides to rescue. ?Loglines are about the "A" story, not the "B" story. ?And the "A" story is about what a protagonist does as a result of the inciting iRead more
As Richiev said, it’s difficult to figure out what the plot of the story is.
The falling in love seems to be the “B” story, what happens after he decides to rescue. ?Loglines are about the “A” story, not the “B” story. ?And the “A” story is about what a protagonist does as a result of the inciting incident. ?So start with the inciting incident. ?What causes the protagonist to come to the rescue of this “cat woman”.
(And what is being a “cat woman” all about, anyway? ?Why does he need to believe in her? ?What does “believe in her” mean? What’s at stake in the story?)
See lessWhen a desilliusioned crusader returns home to his wife and finds out that she has been absorbed by hell, he needs to get her out there before her soul becomes lost.
What Nir Shelter said. ?The logline plays rather fast and loose with Catholic theology. ?Which can be done up to a point. ?There are rules and a story leveraging the Catholic notion of hell has to conform to them to retain credibility. ?One of them is that once a person is consigned to hell, there'sRead more
What Nir Shelter said. ?The logline plays rather fast and loose with Catholic theology. ?Which can be done up to a point. ?There are rules and a story leveraging the Catholic notion of hell has to conform to them to retain credibility. ?One of them is that once a person is consigned to hell, there’s not way back. ?Nobody in the corporal, temporal world can save some one else.
(Purgatory is a different matter.)
See lessTwo females of an ancient African tribe who morph into elephants save the life of a young girl but the village witch doctor sees them as abominations and issues their deaths.
I like Foxtrot25 's polish, but I ?am puzzled by the premise as a whole.The girls do something good -- and witch doctor wants to kill them. ?Why?I realize this is a fantasy. ?And fantasy has dramatic license to bend the rules. ?But once a rule has been bent, it must be consistently bent. Now then, bRead more
I like Foxtrot25 ‘s polish, but I ?am puzzled by the premise as a whole.
The girls do something good — and witch doctor wants to kill them. ?Why?
I realize this is a fantasy. ?And fantasy has dramatic license to bend the rules. ?But once a rule has been bent, it must be consistently bent. Now then, being able to shape shifter is pretty powerful mojo. ?So what credible threat does the witch doctor pose that they can’t fend off? ?If they can bend the rule, ?shape shift to save a village girl’s life, why can’t they likewise bend the rule and shape shift to save their own??
fwiw
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