1. Posted: August 24, 2017In:

    A high school basketball phenom drops out of school and drifts for thirteen years, but his luck is about to change as the road to redemption, love, and a second chance runs right through McCallister Park.

    dpg Singularity

    This bears a resemblance to "The Natural". ?Other than the sport, what distinguishes this from that film which was also about redemption, love and a 2nd chance? And what is the inciting incident? ?Why did he drop out and drift for 13 years?

    This bears a resemblance to “The Natural”. ?Other than the sport, what distinguishes this from that film which was also about redemption, love and a 2nd chance?

    And what is the inciting incident? ?Why did he drop out and drift for 13 years?

    See less
    • 0
  2. Posted: August 23, 2017In:

    After a twister transports a lonely Kansas farm girl to a magical land, she sets out on a dangerous journey to find a wizard with the powers to send her home.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity

    My favorite "twist" on the story premise.

    My favorite “twist” on the story premise.

    See less
    • 0
  3. Posted: August 23, 2017In:

    When an aspiring writer blogs anonymously about her dates, one of them finds out who she is and continues dating her in order to improve his dating style to ask out someone else.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity

    Richiev's version makes it a re-tooling of the premise of the 2005 Will Smith film, "Hitch". ? ?Well, maybe. Richiev is ?correct that the standard complication for a story of this genre is for the protagonist to unexpectedly fall in love with the person with whom he starts a relationship with on theRead more

    Richiev’s version makes it a re-tooling of the premise of the 2005 Will Smith film, “Hitch”. ? ?Well, maybe.

    Richiev is ?correct that the standard complication for a story of this genre is for the protagonist to unexpectedly fall in love with the person with whom he starts a relationship with on the wrong foot (aka: they “meet cute”). After all, it is a romance.

    And why would she continue to accept dates with him if some positive alchemy wasn’t developing in her mind in spite of her him two thumbs down reviews?

    So yeah, the logline would benefit from a polish that includes a romantic complication.

    See less
    • 0