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In a future dystopia an alcoholic detective’s routine investigation into a string of missing children leads him to the discovery that his deceased daughter might still be alive.
>> like mentioning the father/daughter/sister of Chinatown.Okay, but from the pov of someone reading the logline, knowing nothing about the story, the plus factor in the logline ?that might interest me -- IOW, the hook -- seems to be in the nature of the dysopian world. ?Not a dipso dad who thRead more
Okay, but from the pov of someone reading the logline, knowing nothing about the story, the plus factor in the logline ?that might interest me — IOW, the hook — seems to be in the nature of the dysopian world. ?Not a dipso dad who thinks his daughter is dead — that could be set almost anywhere, in any time frame. ?It’s not contingent on the setting. ?By itself, I don’t think it’s a strong hook.
It seems to me that the ?element that most qualifies to be a strong hook in your story is the setting, the dystopia. But I have no idea what differentiates this dystopia from ?say “1984” or “Brave New World” or “Blade Runner” or “Soylent Green” ?– or any other futuristic world gone to hell in a hand basket..
And, of course, ?a hook is not the same as the end of Act2, Big Reveal (as in “Chinatown”). ? And a Big Reveal ?should never be part of a logline; ?a logline should never have a spoiler. ?Rather, a hook in a logline has to be some element ?that will hook the audience’s interest ?in Act 1. ?No audience, particularly these days when there are so many competing entertainment venues, is going to stay with a movie for a story hook that doesn’t happen until 90 minutes into the film. ?The film must hook the audience’s attention and hold it within 25-30 minutes, in Act 1.
So, ?my point is that whatever that Act 1 hook is should also be the hook of the logline.
IMHO: the most important element in a logline is the hook. ?And right now, I don’t see it.?
Just saying.
See lessUpon realizing that aging process has stopped, Nymph must continue living life using the ?psychological weapon? in order to keep her family and clone children safe and alive, while she is working together with a Demon ? making love means unleashing the weapon.
I can't make heads nor tails of this logline. ?I have no idea what the story is about. ?Please reword and clarify.
I can’t make heads nor tails of this logline. ?I have no idea what the story is about. ?Please reword and clarify.
See lessIn a future dystopia an alcoholic detective’s routine investigation into a string of missing children leads him to the discovery that his deceased daughter might still be alive.
What is there about this dystopian future that is implicated ?in what he thought was the death of his daughter??What is so uniquely gawd-awful about this future that distinguishes from other scenarios about a dystopian future?There must be something about the dystopian world that makes the dramaticRead more
What is there about this dystopian future that is implicated ?in what he thought was the death of his daughter?
?What is so uniquely gawd-awful about this future that distinguishes from other scenarios about a dystopian future?
There must be something about the dystopian world that makes the dramatic mystery to be solved possible, some factor that does not exist in our current world. ?Or there is something about the dystopian world that complicates the solution to the mystery, a complication that wouldn’t exist in our current world.
If the dystopia neither creates nor complicates the dramatic problem, ?it’s seems like it’s a throwaway concept.
What’s the justification ?– the dramatic need — for setting the story in the future rather than the present?
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