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  1. Posted: January 26, 2017In: SciFi

    Aliens in need of a battlefield chose earth for their war, now in the remnant of the devastating war; a suicidal man must find a reason to save humanity, which is facing extinction.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on January 28, 2017 at 1:33 pm

    In defining the protagonist as "suicidal" you're portraying him as a "least likely" hero. ?Which is a bona fide dramatic gimmick.Well, wouldn't casting the protagonist as a "least likely" woman also do the job? ?Make her a liberal arts major, a wannabe poet :-).Then send her on a "Hero's Journey" toRead more

    In defining the protagonist as “suicidal” you’re portraying him as a “least likely” hero. ?Which is a bona fide dramatic gimmick.

    Well, wouldn’t casting the protagonist as a “least likely” woman also do the job? ?Make her a liberal arts major, a wannabe poet :-).

    Then send her on a “Hero’s Journey” to discover and develop her latent abilities, ?save humanity, save the planet. ? The most likely?candidate for a “Hero’s Journey” is a character whom everyone else in the story thinks is “least likely”.

    Whatever, I suggest you develop the plot such that it unravels through a series of movies –a franchise. ?Franchise potential is the honey pot. (And’s is why I give the concept a thumbs up, though it needs polishing.)

    fwiw

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  2. Posted: January 28, 2017In: Action

    A spy with a big mouth must destroy an enemy radar station before more planes are shot down.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on January 28, 2017 at 1:15 pm

    As Nir Shelter said.A character flaw needs to be relevant to the struggle, germane to the protagonist's objective goal. ?The dramatic function of the character flaw is to hobble the protagonist such that it will cause him to fail unless he overcomes it. I fail to see how having a big mouth performsRead more

    As Nir Shelter said.

    A character flaw needs to be relevant to the struggle, germane to the protagonist’s objective goal. ?The dramatic function of the character flaw is to hobble the protagonist such that it will cause him to fail unless he overcomes it. I fail to see how having a big mouth performs that dramatic function.

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  3. Posted: January 28, 2017In: Comedy

    Two dim-witted best friends battle the internet and their conservative town to keep their porn shop open.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on January 28, 2017 at 1:03 pm

    The battle with the conservative local morality is credible. ?But I still can't buy the internet angle, even as a comedy.Unless you set the battle in the late -90's at the ?start of the age of the internet. ?The guys battle the local blue ?noses, are driven to the edge of financial ruin . But in theRead more

    The battle with the conservative local morality is credible. ?But I still can’t buy the internet angle, even as a comedy.

    Unless you set the battle in the late -90’s at the ?start of the age of the internet. ?The guys battle the local blue ?noses, are driven to the edge of financial ruin . But in the 3rd Act they finally triumph, defeat all attempts to shut down the porn shop.

    Only to have to close the shop because of the internet siphons off all the customers. ?That, it seems to me, is the logical and inevitable button beat to the story.

    fwiw

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