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I mixed two loglines I’ve had before and wrote the one below. What do you think? Thanks for your feedback and help so far! It helped me a lot! – “When an agoraphobe student from New York City falls for a pop star, he must overcome his fear in public or lose her forever.”
Agree with CraigDGriffiths. ?It seems like it's a one-sided love affair. ?He's in love with her, but is she in love with him? ? And how: If he's agoraphobic, how do they meet? ?How does she even know that he's interested in her? How can he even begin a romantic relationship w/ her if he's agoraphobiRead more
Agree with CraigDGriffiths. ?It seems like it’s a one-sided love affair. ?He’s in love with her, but is she in love with him? ? And how: If he’s agoraphobic, how do they meet? ?How does she even know that he’s interested in her?
How can he even begin a romantic relationship w/ her if he’s agoraphobic? ? What’s the meet cute moment? Is it the inciting incident? ?When he goes out to meet her, introduce himself to her in spite of his agoraphobia.
See lessA troubled boy, on the run from the law and terribly injured, will be saved after he receives a transplant of the world?s most special heart. But his destiny and all that comes with it will be hard earned as he fights his incredible transformation in every way he can.
Is this an origin episode for a new superhero series (franchise)?
Is this an origin episode for a new superhero series (franchise)?
See lessBack under construction again.
Is the ghost lover literal (as he's a real ghost; there's a supernatural element to the story) or is he figurative? And I frankly don't see how "reconstructing the house" will restore the careful balance? ?And what's the visual look like for "careful balance". ?As film is a visual medium there needsRead more
Is the ghost lover literal (as he’s a real ghost; there’s a supernatural element to the story) or is he figurative?
And I frankly don’t see how “reconstructing the house” will restore the careful balance? ?And what’s the visual look like for “careful balance”. ?As film is a visual medium there needs to be a visual moment that signals to the audience that the protagonist has achieved her objective goal. ?For example, if a female runner’s objective goal is to win Olympic gold, then the obvious visual moment that signals success is when she breaks the tape at the Olympic games.
Finally, how does her being a historical researcher directly figure into her objective goal as either an asset or a liability (aka: character flaw). ?That she is an historical researcher may flesh out her character in the script, but for the purpose of this logline it seems, well, irrelevant.
In a logline, where every word must count, any description of the character should relate directly to the objective goal and the central conflict entailed in struggling for that goal. ?Directly either in the sense that the description is about a trait that threatens to defeat the character in her struggle ?(the more common use) or is necessary for the character to reach her goal (less common).
Examples: ? “The King’s Speech” is about a “stuttering prince”; his stuttering is a liability that threatens to doom him to ?fail to fulfill his objective goal, playing out his role as an English monarch. ?Whereas “Almost Famous” is about a precocious 15-year old boy who gets a writing assignment from the magazine “Rolling Stone”; his precocity is an asset he needs to achieve his objective goal of filing his assignment on deadline.
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