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  1. Posted: September 20, 2016In: Student Loglines

    When a gifted nostalgia caseworker disappears, a Man and Woman use their third-mind to relate clues sifted via ghost impressions rising from the dust around them.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on September 20, 2016 at 9:45 pm

    SouthWestSusie,I neglected to say that I think using Burrough's "third mind" as a narrative device would be a neat trick to pull off in the script proper. ?Particularly since Burroughs got the idea from how ?a causal narrative is constructed in movies. ?But, alas, I fear it's too obscure a referenceRead more

    SouthWestSusie,

    I neglected to say that I think using Burrough’s “third mind” as a narrative device would be a neat trick to pull off in the script proper. ?Particularly since Burroughs got the idea from how ?a causal narrative is constructed in movies. ?But, alas, I fear it’s too obscure a reference for most people to get in a logline. ?Transport ?the “third mind” technique on the rails of a strong story line in the script and I think you would have the makings of an interesting movie.

    Best wishes.

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  2. Posted: September 19, 2016In: Student Loglines

    Two fed-up women take off for a weekend getaway but when one is almost raped and the other kills the guy the holiday turns into a road trip to escape to Mexico.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on September 20, 2016 at 9:26 pm

    As Nir Shelter said, SouthWestSusie, a logline should lead off with the inciting incident.One thing your logline was on the right track to do was to frame the reversal of fortune, their initial expectation/goal (weekend getaway) in contrast to how events play out (a ?road trip to escape...). ?I chanRead more

    As Nir Shelter said, SouthWestSusie, a logline should lead off with the inciting incident.

    One thing your logline was on the right track to do was to frame the reversal of fortune, their initial expectation/goal (weekend getaway) in contrast to how events play out (a ?road trip to escape…). ?I changed ?”road trip” to “crime spree” because that is what their flight becomes and it ?worsens their predicament, ?ultimately seals their fate.

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  3. Posted: September 20, 2016In: Student Loglines

    When a gifted nostalgia caseworker disappears, a Man and Woman use their third-mind to relate clues sifted via ghost impressions rising from the dust around them.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on September 20, 2016 at 8:42 am

    What Richiev said. "Nostalgia caseworker" -- what is that? ?"Ghost impressions" -- say what? ?And very few logline readers are going to pick up on "third mind to relate clues" ?as a reference to William Burroughs. ?And if I'm wrong in connecting the dots to Burroughs, then that is additional proof tRead more

    What Richiev said.

    “Nostalgia caseworker” — what is that? ?”Ghost impressions” — say what? ?And very few logline readers are going to pick up on “third mind to relate clues” ?as a reference to William Burroughs. ?And if I’m wrong in connecting the dots to Burroughs, then that is additional proof that the logline misleads and mystifies instead of informs.

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