1. Posted: August 2, 2016In:

    When her shark-diving cage breaks off and sinks to the seabed, a first-time diver must resurface amidst a looming great white before her oxygen tank runs out. [In The Deep, 2016]

    dpg Singularity

    The IMDB entry describes the film as two sisters trapped in the cage . ?So here is my take with co-protagonists: When their shark observation cage breaks off and sinks to the bottom, two sisters, first time divers, must?resurface amidst looming great whites before they run out of oxygen. (29 words)

    The IMDB entry describes the film as two sisters trapped in the cage . ?So here is my take with co-protagonists:

    When their shark observation cage breaks off and sinks to the bottom, two sisters, first time divers, must?resurface amidst looming great whites before they run out of oxygen.
    (29 words)

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  2. Posted: July 31, 2016In:

    When an image conscious love expert falls for the wrong guy, a crass hacker geek, her page views plummet, forcing her ruthless producer to manipulate her insecurities to tear them apart. 31 Words (Revised) (RomCom)

    dpg Singularity

    Isn't ?the desire of all protagonists in romcoms to satisfy their subjective need to "find happiness"? ?So what distinguishes the character's pursuit of happiness in this story from that of other romcoms?A logline is a brief summary of a plot. ?And a plot ?is about a protagonist pursuing an objectivRead more

    Isn’t ?the desire of all protagonists in romcoms to satisfy their subjective need to “find happiness”? ?So what distinguishes the character’s pursuit of happiness in this story from that of other romcoms?

    A logline is a brief summary of a plot. ?And a plot ?is about a protagonist pursuing an objective goal in spite of obstacles and complications. ?

    So what is her objective goal? ?Happiness is not an objective goal — it’s a subjective want or need. ?It’s the byproduct, the consequence, the bonus effect for achieving an objective goal. ?In this logline the plot would be about the particular objective goal the expert pursues to realize her subjective need for happiness.

    Your logline sets up the trigger for a plot (she’s dumped) and complications for what happens after a plot would be set in motion (bad advice and ?ongoing insecurities). ?Good.?

    But it ?is missing the crucial element ?that gives the story ?forward momentum, a story vector, ?a direction. ?A logline needs to indicate where the story is going, not just where it’s been (rejected by her boyfriend). ?And to do that, it needs to delineate ?her specific objective goal that when achieved will have a bonus payout of happiness.?

    fwiw

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  3. Posted: July 31, 2016In:

    An orphaned young woman discovers she’s only half human when an Alien warrior is unleashed on earth to destroy the only weapon capable of stopping the forthcoming invasion, her.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity

    Like Dkpough1 I am weary of the "Chosen One-Great White Hope" trope. ? Which this story would seem to avoid given the character is a hybrid species, hence and hopefully won't be cast with a blue-eyed, bleach-blonde Aryan. (But casting is beyond the control of the writer.)As to coming of age: I am acRead more

    Like Dkpough1 I am weary of the “Chosen One-Great White Hope” trope. ? Which this story would seem to avoid given the character is a hybrid species, hence and hopefully won’t be cast with a blue-eyed, bleach-blonde Aryan. (But casting is beyond the control of the writer.)

    As to coming of age: I am actually thinking of coming of age/rite of passage plot scenarios explicit and implicit in mythology and the Hero’s Journey paradigm.

    >>>The plot is, trying to survive,

    Katniss Everdeen is trying to survive in “The Hunger Games”, too. ? The plot is about her particular?process of surviving. ?What is your character’s particular process of surviving? ?What distinguishes your character’s struggle to survive from hers? ?(And through her process of surviving, the plot in “The Hunger Games” becomes about more, a lot more, than merely staying alive. )

    fwiw

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