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The U.S. govt., along with Nasa, devise a plot to relocate people of color to inhabit the moon; against their will!
Why? And more importantly, why do we care? The plot by the government could be to protect everyone of colour from a gang of racist aliens... Without a protagonist though, we're watching the news, not a movie.
Why? And more importantly, why do we care? The plot by the government could be to protect everyone of colour from a gang of racist aliens… Without a protagonist though, we’re watching the news, not a movie.
See lessA detective fiction writer becomes convinced her lover’s death wasn’t a suicide and must prove his brilliant wife is a killer before becoming the next victim.
There is definitely something to this idea but the logline is a little confusing. It took me a while to figure out just who everyone was. I think it needs to made more clear that her lover is a married man. I was wondering whether this story might be more interesting if the protagonist herself is maRead more
There is definitely something to this idea but the logline is a little confusing. It took me a while to figure out just who everyone was. I think it needs to made more clear that her lover is a married man. I was wondering whether this story might be more interesting if the protagonist herself is married, and she’s living with the person she believes might have killed her lover… but she can’t let on otherwise she’s admitting infidelity. I really like the two female leads battling it out so maybe she’s a married lesbian and she has an affair with a man who ends up dead?
This has legs for sure! I think it’s just about clarity at the moment. “Crime fiction writer” is much clearer, and I agree with sloanpeterson (SAVE FERRIS) that “brilliant” is possibly not the right choice but it’s heading in the right direction. The idea of watching a thriller like this, mostly contained within one house, like a tense noir… yeah!! I do really want them to live with each other 24/7 though… but that might not be the story you want to tell.
For research check out Fincher’s Gone Girl and Les Diaboliques. The latter is an amazing film which is PERFECT for what you’re trying to write.
Hope this helps.
See lessEDITED: In Victorian London a ruthless spy battles a fanatic telepath to thwart his plot to kill the Queen and plunge the world into war.
Last one is perfect! Hahaha. That being said though, I love loglines - once you nail a really good one you suddenly have something that can be a vital tool throughout both your writing and marketing process. It can tell a producer potential budget, locations, theme, tone, number of actors, etc etc.Read more
Last one is perfect! Hahaha. That being said though, I love loglines – once you nail a really good one you suddenly have something that can be a vital tool throughout both your writing and marketing process. It can tell a producer potential budget, locations, theme, tone, number of actors, etc etc. It might seem like a pointless task to appease lazy producers, but actually once you embrace the format, being able to distill the essence of your plot to a single sentence is a far more valuable skill than most writers give it credit for.
I like zealot – but I want to know what his belief is. I want to know why killing the Queen will start a world war. Why does he want to start a world war in the first place? See Richiev’s comments. We need to know the endgame to understand why it’s so important. Richiev just referred to the bad guy as a “telepathic assassin”… I think that works and needs less explanation (other than the “why” issue).
If you want, message me with your synopsis. Happy to take a look.
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