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With the help of his undead lost love, a reluctant store manager must return to the island where she was slain to prevent the escape of a primitive evil before the anniversary of her death.
The cause and effect relationship between the major story beats is unclear. What makes him HAVE to go to the island and stop the evil thing? And, what will happen if he doesn't go?
The cause and effect relationship between the major story beats is unclear.
What makes him HAVE to go to the island and stop the evil thing?
And, what will happen if he doesn’t go?
See lessAn overnight caregiver and a bored stiff succubus form an unlikely alliance to launch a dark web speed dating site.
Neither of the characters seems flawed in a way that implies a journey of change, and at the same time (like Richiev said) there appear to be very little stakes and conflict.According to the logline, the two meet, agree on their terms of collaboration and launch a dating website - end of story. HowRead more
Neither of the characters seems flawed in a way that implies a journey of change, and at the same time (like Richiev said) there appear to be very little stakes and conflict.
According to the logline, the two meet, agree on their terms of collaboration and launch a dating website – end of story. How will that be dramatic? What force is opposing them? And how will they internally change as a result?
See less‘Off The Grid’ After moving off the grid, bickering newlyweds accidentally kill the creepy neighbors kid and now must work together to escape the families vengeful wrath.
As for the logline, it seems that the story is there: the main characters cause an accident, kill a boy and now have to fend for their lives - fine. The problem is that it sounds rather generic, if not a bit flat. Perhaps if the setting was unique or the way in which the father tries to kill them waRead more
As for the logline, it seems that the story is there: the main characters cause an accident, kill a boy and now have to fend for their lives – fine. The problem is that it sounds rather generic, if not a bit flat. Perhaps if the setting was unique or the way in which the father tries to kill them was original it would help elevate the premise.
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