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After the outlaw who murdered her father steals her train and frames her for the theft, a gutsy engineer must go on the lam to stop him from pulling off the biggest heist in US history.
Thanks for the suggestions. I agree about it being too wordy, and dropped "who murdered her father" and "go on the lam to", as well as a choice adjective for the outlaw. Someone thought "gutsy" was somewhat overused, so they thought "audacious" might work better, but I'm not sure if many people areRead more
Thanks for the suggestions.
I agree about it being too wordy, and dropped “who murdered her father” and “go on the lam to”, as well as a choice adjective for the outlaw.
Someone thought “gutsy” was somewhat overused, so they thought “audacious” might work better, but I’m not sure if many people are familiar with the word.
See lessAfter the outlaw who murdered her father steals her train and frames her for the theft, a gutsy engineer must go on the lam to stop him from pulling off the biggest heist in US history.
Thanks for the suggestions. I agree about it being too wordy, and dropped "who murdered her father" and "go on the lam to", as well as a choice adjective for the outlaw. Someone thought "gutsy" was somewhat overused, so they thought "audacious" might work better, but I'm not sure if many people areRead more
Thanks for the suggestions.
I agree about it being too wordy, and dropped “who murdered her father” and “go on the lam to”, as well as a choice adjective for the outlaw.
Someone thought “gutsy” was somewhat overused, so they thought “audacious” might work better, but I’m not sure if many people are familiar with the word.
See lessAn engineer accused of treason goes on the lam to recover the fastest train in the West, which has been stolen by a notorious outlaw to pull off a million-dollar robbery.
It never occurred to me that some people might not understand "goes on the lam," so try this on for size: "An engineer accused of treason runs from the law in order to clear her name and recover the fastest train in the West, which has been stolen by a notorious outlaw to pull off a million-dollar rRead more
It never occurred to me that some people might not understand “goes on the lam,” so try this on for size:
“An engineer accused of treason runs from the law in order to clear her name and recover the fastest train in the West, which has been stolen by a notorious outlaw to pull off a million-dollar robbery.”
My only concern – too wordy? or does it still work?
See less