1. Posted: November 5, 2012In:

    An out-of-control teen is sentenced to an unorthodox rehab, where she'll have to fight to survive, but when kids begin disappearing, there's a race against time to find out the truth before she becomes the next victim.

    TanyaH

    When an out-of-control teen is sentenced to rehab, she refuses to play by the rules, but when patients begin disappearing she's determined to uncover the truth out of fear of becoming the next victim.

    When an out-of-control teen is sentenced to rehab, she refuses to play by the rules, but when patients begin disappearing she’s determined to uncover the truth out of fear of becoming the next victim.

    See less
    • 0
  2. Posted: November 5, 2012In:

    In a long-suffering hockey town, the most vocal caller to sports talk radio must to turn all his talk into action when the team's frustrated owner decides to make him general manager.

    TanyaH

    Less Talk, More Action! Love this idea. I can see Jack Black as the know-it-all caller who gets the shock of his life when he is thrown in to a manager job. It is a comedy right? Even better if he is a lazy jobless nut. With a lot of talk! Could even be he was a great player in his youth but somethiRead more

    Less Talk, More Action!
    Love this idea. I can see Jack Black as the know-it-all caller who gets the shock of his life when he is thrown in to a manager job. It is a comedy right? Even better if he is a lazy jobless nut. With a lot of talk! Could even be he was a great player in his youth but something happened that destroyed his dream.

    Okay I’m totally guessing here!!

    I’m in the process of learning how to write a really good logline so my advice may not be all that professional but I can only go by my gut reaction to your logline, at the moment something isn’t quite right.

    How about:

    Less Talk, More Action.

    In a last ditch attempt to save his hockey team, a frustrated manager hires the local know-it-all as coach, after hearing him on the radio.

    Hope it helps x

    See less
    • 0
  3. Posted: November 5, 2012In:

    An out-of-control teen is sentenced to an unorthodox rehab, where she'll have to fight to survive, but when kids begin disappearing, there's a race against time to find out the truth before she becomes the next victim.

    TanyaH

    Thanks! Mmm okay so it's not the facility that is unorthodox but what happens there, so I might lose that word if it causes confusion and also if the logline is to get buyers interest do I give away the twist?? Do I say what second skin actually refers to?? It's not physical like epidermis it's a psRead more

    Thanks! Mmm okay so it’s not the facility that is unorthodox but what happens there, so I might lose that word if it causes confusion and also if the logline is to get buyers interest do I give away the twist?? Do I say what second skin actually refers to?? It’s not physical like epidermis it’s a psychological reference as the main character undergoes a identity struggle and splits in two. Her second skin being her alter ego, her dark side.

    I don’t know how much to reveal in a logline, but I want my script to be read and ultimately bought, so do I tell them it’s a psychological thriller like Shutter Island/Raising Cain etc with a twist and do I tell them what that twist is???

    See less
    • 0