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Three outcast friends lead their town’s residents on a perilous journey to save them from terrorists who scheme to enslave their women for the sex trade
Hi Ben, This reminds me of RED DAWN. I think you just need to lean it out a bit and get it down to 25 words. Something like... When terrorists attack a small town, three childhood friends must help a group of fellow-citizens to escape by escorting them to a nearby mountain before they are killed. ReRead more
Hi Ben,
This reminds me of RED DAWN. I think you just need to lean it out a bit and get it down to 25 words. Something like…
When terrorists attack a small town, three childhood friends must help a group of fellow-citizens to escape by escorting them to a nearby mountain before they are killed.
Regardless – I think yours is a good working logline before you start the first draft.
See lessAn American police officer teams up with a Japanese convicted felon to take down a drug lord who set them up in a drug deal gone wrong.
I agree with Richiev. Certainly the odd couple aspect works. I'm thinking the X meets Y of this is BLACK RAIN meets 48 HOURS.
I agree with Richiev. Certainly the odd couple aspect works. I’m thinking the X meets Y of this is BLACK RAIN meets 48 HOURS.
See lessWhen his dad threatens to cut him off financially, a bad boy rich kid must graduate his senior year at a strict prep school, only to fall for the principal’s daughter.
DPG - I've been studying this one and only just realized you've contradicted yourself. ** Loglines are about objective goals, not subjective needs. ** Months back - you said that the action goal/outside story/objective goal is not a hard and fast rule in a logline. That sometimes it can be a subjectRead more
DPG – I’ve been studying this one and only just realized you’ve contradicted yourself.
** Loglines are about objective goals, not subjective needs. **
Months back – you said that the action goal/outside story/objective goal is not a hard and fast rule in a logline. That sometimes it can be a subjective need (as long as the hook is strong.)
They want to get to LA.(action goal.)
They want the money. (action goal.)
They want a kidney. (action goal.)
They want the girl. (Subjective goal. I personally see nothing wrong with this – as long as the hook is strong and unique.)
They want to graduate (an action goal. not thrilling but it’s there.)
Also – some of your tone in this suggests you really don’t like rich people. All of which makes me think of Sorkin’s words – “be careful who you listen to. make sure they’re not trying to write your script the way they’d write it.”
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