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Maestro · 6,820 points

3,180 points to Legend

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on When a college athlete discovers that the university’s Greek Life is a front for demonic mafias who have been corrupting students with a supernatural drug, he launches a crusade against Hell, risking his enrollment, and his life, in the process. ★ Accepted

I like the devil's pact angle, & the gateway joke. apart from the logline, the rest of the outline looks like this: A university student named Alex, struggling with peer pressure (since he doesn't knows yet - about the secret…
on A woman finds a phone connected to the future, she is tasked by people to do a series of increasingly extreme tasks in an attempt to fix their present, or it may be her latest bout of mental illness.

The premise is very interesting. Suggesting her incentive - why should she helps them - will make it more believable, when she continues to attempt the increasingly extreme tasks.
on Seeing his wife’s ghost each morning for breakfast a man becomes vigilante after the police decide to stop investigating her murder.

I love the outline. I like the section where he realizes he has become part of the problem; this will help explore the theme. What he does for a living, might have this movie inadvertently be compared to the taxi…
on Seeing his wife’s ghost each morning for breakfast a man becomes vigilante after the police decide to stop investigating her murder.

After reading the text under the logline I could make complete sense. So that needs to change. Otherwise I really like the idea/ where it’s going.
on A corrupt rural sheriff must find a senator’s abducted daughter to bring a quick end to an FBI manhunt that could expose his ties to local drug trafficking.

Why do we root for him?
on Unbeknownst to Mani’s death at a construction site, Sivagami, his wife must work hard to repay the money her husband got from a nefarious recruiter and anticipate his return; Incompetent, Munniyapan accepts the recruiter’s idea to work at the same construction site gets electrocuted and die. His Mother and Grandfather continue to wait for their return.

How is Sivagami's life related to the family of Munniyapan? Sivagami's story seems to have the potential for action and conflict. 'Waiting for Munniyapan' isn't something very visual & engaging, unless you add necessary details to it. Hope this helps.
on Guided by their inspirational French teacher, a diverse group of adult students escape the backdrop of modern-day West London and find new meaning in their lives by exploring Frenchman Jean Giono’s celebrated short story ‘The Man Who Planted Trees’ about one man’s hope for humanity via his generosity to nature.

what constitutes 'exploring'? how do they 'find new meaning in their lives'? what specific action takes place?
on A young man sees his dead girlfriend through near death experiences.

In the context of a logline this can be the inciting incident of the film. The premise has potential. His dramatic need to keep seeing his girlfriend can drive him to commit near death experiences. What stops him from doing…
on When a family member haunts them as a ghost, two dysfunctional families must cope with either life or death.

Sorry, this tells us nothing. Please go through the formula tab on the top. It's quite awesome :))
on After stealing a mysterious present on Christmas Eve, a selfish little boy must repent or be devoured by a monstrous elf.

repent to whom?; v/s being devoured by a monstrous elf, isn't that an obvious choice?