philasify

Penpusher · 195 points

105 points to Logliner

6 loglines
5 reviews

When a struggling newlywed couple discovers millions hidden in their fixer-upper home, they promise their dysfunctional neighbors a share of the cash if they help fend off a deadly drug cartel—all while keeping the feds off their radar.

December 29, 2024
A fast-talking scam artist and ex-convict looking to avoid a lengthy prison sentence agrees to dig up dirt for the FBI by posing as a new convert in the local Muslim community

January 11, 2023
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After being taken hostage following a bank robbery by two bumbling crooks, a fame-obsessed video blogger sees an opportunity to skyrocket her popularity by secretly live-streaming her ordeal with the police hot on their trail.

September 19, 2019
Inspired by real events, an irreligious man tormented by supernatural disturbances in his newly-purchased home must seek help from unfamiliar sources when he learns he is dealing with the fiery spirits of Islamic lore—the Jinn.

December 27, 2018
After a fluke undercover drug bust saves their jobs, repairs the department’s damaged reputation and turns them into unlikely heroes, two sleazy and morally bankrupt city cops are targeted by the dangerous drug syndicate they accidentally swindled.

February 13, 2018
Two sleazy disgraceful cops become unlikely heroes in their last-ditch effort to save their jobs and the damaged reputation of their department by vowing to take down a powerful drug and sex trafficking operation they’re steady customers of.

May 3, 2017

on about an elderly samurai named Genjiro who doesn’t grow up? He gets taken in by his granddaughter and her partner. He has as a childhood friend and love interest a la Wendy Darling and she also rapidly ages. There’s a girl whom he shares advice with.

This isn't really a logline. The format would be: When [inciting event] occurs, a [character and their description] must [dynamic action] to overcome [obstacle].
on When he escapes from a woman who wants to keep him, a runaway boy must decide what to do with his abusive father when he discovers that he survived the first attempt to kill him.

Sounds intriguing but I think the logline could use some work so it matches your additional story premise shared. Maybe something like "After running away from home following shooting his abusive father to save his mother, a preteen boy escapes…
on A Facebook friend request, changes the life of a man undergoing mid life crisis, as he discovers, his former best friend, is a hitman.

Why do I immediately think of that Adam Sandler/David Spade Netflix movie when I read this? Anyway yeah the logline is missing a good hook and the goal of the protagonist as been said by the others.
on A secretly psychic troubleshooter, after”seeing” an old Nazi secret is part of the trouble she has to “shoot”, has to decide if she can live with it.

Too much vagueness in the logline? (a "troubleshooter" what's that? Sounds like an IT guy). Don't hide the secret from the logline reader and then the "shoot" portion brings more confusion. Remember that a logline is mainly for some Hollywood…
on Short Film: An old black man living in a quiet retirement home finds a record player than, when used, makes the listener(s) young again..

Sounds intriguing. I believe the "than" is a typo and it's supposed to be "that"? I feel like there should be a conflict or predicament in the logline at the end. Old Black Man meets Record player that makes him…

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