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Interwined stories between an Russian immigrant, a brother and sister dealing with their abusive father, a drug dealer and a pimp in four tales of sex, drugs and murder in Brighton Beach, Brooklyn.
Missing the arc of these intertwined stories. Pulp Fiction: "The lives of two mob hitmen, a boxer, a gangster’s wife, and a pair of diner bandits intertwine in four tales of violence and redemption"
Missing the arc of these intertwined stories.
Pulp Fiction: “The lives of two mob hitmen, a boxer, a gangster’s wife, and a pair of diner bandits intertwine in four tales of violence and redemption”
See lessFerocious identical twins Reggie and Ronnie Kray are at the top of London’s criminal underworld. Stopping at nothing to maintain their dominance, establishing themselves as two of the most feared and respected gangsters in London’s history.
Consider the following: 1. Dig the ferocious duo protags. 2. A worldbuilder may help as this is a period piece. 3. Do they start at the top, fall, then return? 4. As a reader, I know the goal, but not the Major Event – call to action. 5. From your synopsis the opposition is a rival gang or a detectiRead more
Consider the following:
1. Dig the ferocious duo protags.
2. A worldbuilder may help as this is a period piece.
3. Do they start at the top, fall, then return?
4. As a reader, I know the goal, but not the Major Event – call to action.
5. From your synopsis the opposition is a rival gang or a detective, this is not referenced in the logline.
6. Click the Formula link in the header for help.
Hope you find this constructive, take care.
See lessWhen two criminal old friends become enemies and seek advice, a clever gangster boss must hide himself to make them end each other, just to learn that time heals all wounds.
Hi Henrik S, First, I assume that a word is missing here: "... to make them end each other _ ..., " but I'll try to give you my take here anyway, even if the syntax of the sentence makes it hard to interpret. The logline presented ends with a character arc, a development of our hero, which is very uRead more
Hi Henrik S,
First, I assume that a word is missing here: “… to make them end each other _ …, ” but I’ll try to give you my take here anyway, even if the syntax of the sentence makes it hard to interpret.
The logline presented ends with a character arc, a development of our hero, which is very unclear who that is. Could be any of the three characters the way I read it, because from the sentence syntax, I can’t tell who you mean when you write “… just to learn that time heals all wounds.” A character arc in general is not part of a logline. If you have an easier time imagining charcter developemnt before a story emerges, fine. Keep in mind though, the character arc, or hero’s journey will only be completed because he’s trying to achieve a specific goal and must face antagonism which he is not capable of overcoming with his current psychological resources. In other words, what external conlfict will force our hero to understand that time heals all wounds? If he doesn’t struggle, he won’t get it. When humans change, they change out of necessity more often than out of sheer will, that is the underpinning of any chracter developement. They are changed by their experience more often than their willforce.
Keeping all this in mind, we need a specific goal for the hero to vie for, as well as tangible consqsequences shoudl he fail to do so, or in other terms, stakes. Also, we need antagonism the hero must overcome to achieve said goal. A useful logline formula her would be, “Protagonist + Struggle with Antagonist + Death Stakes.” It’s one of many, but contains all the vital ingredients for the major conflict in the idea and will fuel the entire narrative.
Without the missing parts and the correct syntax for the logline it’s almost impossible to craft some suggestion.
Cheers,
See lessBeeZeeBee