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  1. Posted: November 3, 2022In: Drama

    An insecure, talented ballet dancer steps beyond her place as the youngest sibling, to confront the grim realities of the Indian real estate industry as she wrangles with the responsibilities of closing up her dying family’s ancestral house.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on November 3, 2022 at 9:04 pm

    You have a character selling her family home, what is the conflict? What is standing in her way?

    You have a character selling her family home, what is the conflict? What is standing in her way?

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  2. Posted: October 24, 2022In: Drama

    A young woman had a different job but decides to follow her cousin’s footsteps in acting.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on October 25, 2022 at 5:10 am

    This isn't a story. If the lead character followed her cousin into acting, (Not just, 'wants to follow') after which she faces some sort of obstacle which stands in her way, then it would be a story.

    This isn’t a story.

    If the lead character followed her cousin into acting, (Not just, ‘wants to follow’) after which she faces some sort of obstacle which stands in her way, then it would be a story.

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  3. Posted: October 22, 2022In: Drama

    A group of young soldiers finds themselves in a world of doing the worst crimes of mankind.

    slogMalik Penpusher
    Added an answer on October 22, 2022 at 10:27 am

    For one part, the logline feels incomplete because lacks the consequences or at least the stakes. For another part, it has redaction problems. "In a world of" is doesn't makes sense and it doesn't add information. And finally, the protagonists need a strong adjetive that gives them character. Ex. ReRead more

    For one part, the logline feels incomplete because lacks the consequences or at least the stakes.

    For another part, it has redaction problems. “In a world of” is doesn’t makes sense and it doesn’t add information.

    And finally, the protagonists need a strong adjetive that gives them character. Ex. Rebels, lunatics, religious, etc.

    Examples to correct the prompt would be:
    A group of young soldiers finds themselves in a violent war in the gaza strip doing the worst crimes to mankind in order to defend the honor of their nation.

    or

    A group of religious young soldiers finds themselves doing the worst war crimes questioning if they are really the good ones despite following their God’s commands.

    Overall, you need to give more information about the character, the type of conflict, what is a stake, the possible consequences and the reasons behind their actions.

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