1. Posted: July 19, 2022In:

    ‘It’s just one of those jobs you never get round to’ replies a man at a police station when he hands in a lost wallet after twenty years. A soccer referee rekindles her pursuit of diamonds stolen by her father when the wallet reappears. Attain her goal or surrender to gaol?

    Richiev Singularity

    A logline is a one-sentence summary of the plot. Your logline attempt is more of a scene than a plot. I would also avoid questions in a logline. "When her father's wallet reappears, a soccer referee rekindles her search for the diamonds he stole." You might also want to add something about who or whRead more

    A logline is a one-sentence summary of the plot.
    Your logline attempt is more of a scene than a plot.
    I would also avoid questions in a logline.

    “When her father’s wallet reappears, a soccer referee rekindles her search for the diamonds he stole.”

    You might also want to add something about who or what is standing in the way of the lead character’s goal.

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  2. Posted: May 13, 2022In:

    In an effort to win souls, a street preacher must convince two boys to walk the literal narrow and difficult path to salvation.

    BenGilani Logliner

    Hi Assaf, is this closer to what you are aiming for? In an effort to increase his disciples, an evangelist preacher must convince two boys to walk the literal narrow and difficult path to salvation. Now, how else can you say this? "walk the literal narrow and difficult path to salvation" re-write anRead more

    Hi Assaf,
    is this closer to what you are aiming for?

    In an effort to increase his disciples, an evangelist preacher must convince two boys to walk the literal narrow and difficult path to salvation.

    Now, how else can you say this? “walk the literal narrow and difficult path to salvation”

    re-write and we will see it then.

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  3. Posted: May 13, 2022In:

    While debating over trusting in skill vs. Trusting in luck, two teenaged friends engage in a quarterstaff duel to prove their philosophical viewpoints

    BenGilani Logliner

    Hi Assaf, Debating over skill vs. luck, two teenage friends engage in (I'm having difficulty understanding quarterstaff duel - What is it?) a duel to prove their philosophical viewpoints. Can you find a substitute for this terminology? I hope this helps

    Hi Assaf,

    Debating over skill vs. luck, two teenage friends engage in (I’m having difficulty understanding quarterstaff duel – What is it?) a duel to prove their philosophical viewpoints.

    Can you find a substitute for this terminology?
    I hope this helps

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