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  1. Posted: November 1, 2021In: Drama

    Ante la enfermedad mental que sufre su madre, Carlos debe aceptar frecuentes cambios en su identidad para conocerla mejor y cuidar de ella.

    Odie Samurai
    Added an answer on November 2, 2021 at 7:33 am

    Translation via Google: Faced with the mental illness suffered by his mother, Carlos must accept frequent changes in his identity to get to know her better and take care of her. Consider the following: State Alzheimer as the disease. Reader rule: don’t mention character names in a logline if they’reRead more

    Translation via Google:
    Faced with the mental illness suffered by his mother, Carlos must accept frequent changes in his identity to get to know her better and take care of her.

    Consider the following:
    State Alzheimer as the disease.
    Reader rule: don’t mention character names in a logline if they’re not a real person e.g., Cleopatra.
    Is Carlos hiding from a storied past? When mom makes him assume a past identity – this can force him to find his true self.
    Add a ticking clock by stating late-stage Alzheimer’s or end-of-life care.

    Hope you find this constructive, please forgive any bad translations, keep going!

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  2. Posted: October 27, 2021In: Drama

    Leaving a trail of bodies in his wake, a vengeful college student must kill the men who murdered his parents while dealing with a determined government agent who will stop at nothing to catch him.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on October 27, 2021 at 1:28 pm

    I get the story from the logline, so that is a plus because sometimes I read a logline and I still have no clue what the story is about. So good job making the story clear. I do think you need one more element or twist in the logline to set this apart from other 'out for vengeance' movies. SomethingRead more

    I get the story from the logline, so that is a plus because sometimes I read a logline and I still have no clue what the story is about. So good job making the story clear.

    I do think you need one more element or twist in the logline to set this apart from other ‘out for vengeance’ movies.
    Something to make the reader of the logline sit up and take notice. Something to make them think, “Ooh, that’s interesting” (A Hook)

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  3. Posted: October 21, 2021In: Drama

    After an estranged middle-aged son loses his mother to a fatal accident, he embarks on a mission to spread her ashes, with his “slow” step-brother in tow, against the family’s wishes.

    [Deleted User]
    Added an answer on October 22, 2021 at 11:23 am

    This is a movie I would want to see! I did get a little confused about "estranged." In the logline it sounds as if estranged from his mother. But the synopsis makes it sound like he is close to his mom--whose final wishes are threatened by dysfunctional family--although he is dysfunctional himself.Read more

    This is a movie I would want to see!

    I did get a little confused about “estranged.” In the logline it sounds as if estranged from his mother. But the synopsis makes it sound like he is close to his mom–whose final wishes are threatened by dysfunctional family–although he is dysfunctional himself. Estranged from daughter? Can you make it more clear in logline what the nature of his relationship to his mother is?

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