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When a single father attempts to recreate an idyllic childhood for his son through his beloved video game, a spark of rebellion from the boy compels him to face the harsh reality of their generational divide.
It's a great setup, but what does the father do with this newfound dilemma? As a father, this conjures up thoughts of me blowing the dust off my old Nintendo and gleefully showing its most famous games only to see my younglings say, "Meh" – what then? Based on your synopsis and the father's passion,Read more
It’s a great setup, but what does the father do with this newfound dilemma? As a father, this conjures up thoughts of me blowing the dust off my old Nintendo and gleefully showing its most famous games only to see my younglings say, “Meh” – what then? Based on your synopsis and the father’s passion, I’m curious how he makes this bygone world come alive in his kiddo.
See lessA young corporate suffers a breakdown that links him to a traditional religion that destroyed his culture. He must overcome an internal conflict and re-discover his spiritual faith so that his identity isn’t diminished forever.
It's not clear what "breakdown that links him" means. Can you make things more specific, because I don't get what exactly is going on. "Internal conflict," "identity [is] diminished," etc are very vague terms.
It’s not clear what “breakdown that links him” means. Can you make things more specific, because I don’t get what exactly is going on. “Internal conflict,” “identity [is] diminished,” etc are very vague terms.
See lessA talented Fil-Am restaurateur returns to his country of birth where he is challenged by an unscrupulous boyhood friend, with a promise of co-ownership, to transform his failing Manila restaurant to number one on TripAdvisor.
The goal of a story doesn't always have to be about saving the world. But the goal should always 'mean the world' to the lead character. I like the elements in your logline but why does making his friend's restaurant number 1 on Trip Advisor 'mean the world' to the lead character? In your story, theRead more
The goal of a story doesn’t always have to be about saving the world.
But the goal should always ‘mean the world’ to the lead character.
I like the elements in your logline but why does making his friend’s restaurant number 1 on Trip Advisor ‘mean the world’ to the lead character?
In your story, the lead has a life back home. If he fails it doesn’t matter. As written in your logline and synopsis, there doesn’t seem to be any stakes.
Anyway, it’s a great concept it just seems to be missing a compelling reason for the lead to want to accomplish his goal. I believe adding that one element would improve an already good story.
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