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Suspecting their cop neighbour of killing and eating children, a couple, new in town, set out to prove it – during his New Year’s Eve party.
What sets the story in motion? You say they suspect their neighbor of killing and eating children, but there must be an event that causes that belief. Unless it would take up too much word space adding the specific inciting incident to the logline will help clarify the story.
What sets the story in motion?
You say they suspect their neighbor of killing and eating children, but there must be an event that causes that belief.
Unless it would take up too much word space adding the specific inciting incident to the logline will help clarify the story.
See lessWaking up in a mansion filled with vampires, two detectives must work their way through four floors to save a missing girl ? and get out alive.
I think this tells it all. I understand the story and the goal of the two leads and the monster in the house scenario. If you make any changes to this logline, make sure they are small
I think this tells it all. I understand the story and the goal of the two leads and the monster in the house scenario.
If you make any changes to this logline, make sure they are small
See lessWhen two bickering sisters inherit their grandmother?s precious doll collection, they get more than they bargain for with a house horde of dolls, and a demonic entity threatening their life.
There are a few descriptions that often pop up in loglines, one of these is; "...get more than they bargained for..." In case you're wondering, another example would be; "...his/her world falls apart..." The point is that these are a perfectly generic description, and by nature add very little to aRead more
There are a few descriptions that often pop up in loglines, one of these is; “…get more than they bargained for…”
In case you’re wondering, another example would be; “…his/her world falls apart…”
The point is that these are a perfectly generic description, and by nature add very little to a logline. Since word real estate is at a premium in loglines, you’d be better of using descriptions that contribute to a clearer understanding of the plot.
Also, it sounds as if the inciting event is the demon appearing, not the inheritance. To that matter, their goal would be vanquishing the demon, which needs to me specified in the logline. Just saying that the demon threatens their lives is an implication that they’ll have to defeat the demon, but it’s not a clear definition of a goal.
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