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When an amateur trick theif is sentenced to 10 years in prison he is forced to hide in his twin brother?s estate where he is given the opportunity to exchange identity with his brother and must now cheat the locals, his brother?s wife and the police by behaving like a well educated landowner in order to maintain his relationship with his 8-year-old daughter.
As mikepedley 85 said, the logline is too long.? And it? juggles too balls.?And it buries what I think is the story hook:? a petty criminal passes himself off his as twin brother in order to avoid going to prison.Also, I suggest the setup needs reworking.? Unless a character has the big bucks to payRead more
As mikepedley 85 said, the logline is too long.? And it? juggles too balls.?
And it buries what I think is the story hook:? a petty criminal passes himself off his as twin brother in order to avoid going to prison.
Also, I suggest the setup needs reworking.? Unless a character has the big bucks to pay for a lawyer to argue that his client needs some time arrange his business affairs, as soon as the judge pronounces sentence, a convicted person is remanded to custody and imprisonment — he goes directly to jail.? ?And there is no clue that this character, an amateur, has that kind of money or legal representation.? ?So there’s that.
See lessWhen a cynical woman and idealistic man find themselves on a sinking boat far out to sea, they must find a way to work together to survive until help arrives.
>> "find themselves on a sinking boat" Only "find themselves"? Something happened that forced them to make a conscious choice, an intentional effort take to a lifeboat to survive. What happened? And why wouldn't two people trapped on a boat work together to stay alive?? How believable that twoRead more
>> “find themselves on a sinking boat”
Only “find themselves”? Something happened that forced them to make a conscious choice, an intentional effort take to a lifeboat to survive. What happened?
And why wouldn’t two people trapped on a boat work together to stay alive?? How believable that two such people would choose to die rather than work together??? Yes, the polarity may be the source of some lively arguments over the meaning of life, politics, art — whatever, but I don’t see how that in any way threatens their chances of survival.? The character traits defined seem incommensurate to the situation.
See lessAfter being suspended from his team, a hockey player disguises himself as a woman and takes the figure skating world by storm, as a Tonya Harding-esque, tough-as-nails new female skater, and in the process, learns how to be a better man.
Plus in response to dpg and mike: I don't see why he "Has" to switch to figure skating. If your lead is going pretend to be a woman, why not as a woman hokey player? After all, that is what your lead is trained in.
Plus in response to dpg and mike: I don’t see why he “Has” to switch to figure skating. If your lead is going pretend to be a woman, why not as a woman hokey player? After all, that is what your lead is trained in.
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