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After her parents die attempting to reach quarantine a teenage girl takes refuge from a pandemic in a valley where she is set upon by a predatory man desperate to save his own daughter at all costs.
The world has fallen apart. ?A bottle of water would be enough reason to kill someone. Don has been travelling wide and far to find insulin for his diabetic daughter. ?He has traveled so far that the only way he will find his way back is the GPS he carried. ?During an argument Sara takes his GPS. ?TRead more
The world has fallen apart. ?A bottle of water would be enough reason to kill someone.
Don has been travelling wide and far to find insulin for his diabetic daughter. ?He has traveled so far that the only way he will find his way back is the GPS he carried. ?During an argument Sara takes his GPS. ?This traps him in the valley. ?Sara is unfortunately only dressed in jeans and a t-shirt (no shoes or other clothes). ?It is winter and she will only last a few days before she dies of exposure. ?Don has everything she owes (he has taken over her caravan).
She doesn’t have the means to make it to the nearest town and Don will not get home in time to save his daughter without the GPS.
This puts them in a fight to the death. ?Don and her could talk it out, but due to action, that options it long gone.
Yes some GPS work without the telephone network, think of the Arctic.
Quarantine was the last safe place on earth as far as Sara and her family knew.
The theme is, how far does a person have to be pushed before they change who they are?
Is it right to act badly for good reasons?
Who is more right, a man willing to kill to protect his daughter or a girl will to steal to protect herself?
See lessWhen video game character’s gain self awareness and actually start killing the players, a young widow must complete the game to escape it.
Why her? What is it about the widow that connects her to the game.If this has not already been written, I would change it a little. This would be an example: ----- Backstory: The lead character could be a mother who gave her son up for adoption when she was a teen. Emotional motivation: She could noRead more
Why her? What is it about the widow that connects her to the game.
If this has not already been written, I would change it a little. This would be an example:
—–
Backstory: The lead character could be a mother who gave her son up for adoption when she was a teen.
Emotional motivation: She could not take the guilt and sadness of what she did.
Story begins: The lead character secretly tracks the son she gave up for adoption 16 years ago and discovers he plays the newest MMO. (Perhaps this could be motivated by the lead becoming a widow)
Emotional Journey: She creates a character in the game and befriends him so she can learn who he as grown up to be.
Inciting incident: Now they get trapped in the game and they must work together but—
Conflict: —she has this BIG secret she has been keeping from him which would of course get revealed at the worst possible moment.
Goal: She is determined to protect her son no matter what. A mamma bear protecting her cub… (She could even be a bear form druid if you want to use it as a metaphor)
See less—–
Your story doesn’t have to go like that, but in my example we can see a connection to the game and surviving that goes beyond just surviving for the sake of surviving but she wants to protect her child as well.
An overconfident successful engineer creates a machine to venture inside a dying notorious murderer?s brain and walk in it like virtual reality, only to find himself lost in the man?s enigmatic mind, while he must escape before the man takes over his mind and body
The plot is unclear, what does the engineer have to achieve? What is his goal? What motivated him? to achieve it? What's the inciting incident? This logline is too long and describes too few story critical elements, I suggest you read the Training tab on the top bar for more information about loglinRead more
The plot is unclear, what does the engineer have to achieve? What is his goal? What motivated him? to achieve it? What’s the inciting incident?
This logline is too long and describes too few story critical elements, I suggest you read the Training tab on the top bar for more information about loglines.
See less