1. Posted: July 27, 2015In:

    Twenty years after the horrific slaying of a family, terrified townsfolk wait in fear for the imminent return of the menacing monster that was put away for the crime.

    mrliteral Samurai

    A suggestion not only of logline structure and detail but possible story elements: "An inexperienced small-town deputy must protect his community from an escaped murderer seeking revenge on those who captured him." It will serve your story to make the protagonist an underdog. Stack the deck againstRead more

    A suggestion not only of logline structure and detail but possible story elements:

    “An inexperienced small-town deputy must protect his community from an escaped murderer seeking revenge on those who captured him.”

    It will serve your story to make the protagonist an underdog. Stack the deck against him. Think of a reason the Sheriff can’t handle it, like maybe he retired, or died, or moved, and no one’s replaced him yet, or the main character is the inexperienced new Sheriff?lots of ways to set this up.

    Why not a female Sheriff? A young woman in law enforcement no one thinks can handle herself, and she manages to defeat the big bad monster guy against all odds? That’s a compelling story. Maybe your script has these elements already, but the purpose of the logline is to present these elements as quickly, simply, and clearly as possible.

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  2. Posted: July 28, 2015In:

    When political and selfish interests become top priorities,other events are secondary including family and love.In a situation where love gets entangled in the midst of it,what happens?

    Clint Cure Penpusher

    This is more like a teaser than a logline. A don't think a logline should ever ask questions.

    This is more like a teaser than a logline. A don’t think a logline should ever ask questions.

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  3. Posted: July 23, 2015In:

    On the brink of instantaneous cloning technology a physicist makes a deal with an old friend for the key to his theory in return for a clone of his wife, but when the cloning goes wrong and his wife begins to forget who he is he must find her clone and decide which version deserves to live.

    mrliteral Samurai

    Or what if -- not to be one of those people who want you to change your story but this is just a possible suggestion -- the competitor wants a clone of the scientist himself, and he then has to track down his own clone when he begins losing his memory?higher stakes, and a time limit, as he remembersRead more

    Or what if — not to be one of those people who want you to change your story but this is just a possible suggestion — the competitor wants a clone of the scientist himself, and he then has to track down his own clone when he begins losing his memory?higher stakes, and a time limit, as he remembers less and less each day. Then you can even pull a twist that he is the clone, and the one he’s looking for is the original, who decided to go with the competitor to steal more secrets?or something more imaginative than that, but still — make it something fun and intriguing, instead of being about ownership of his wife.

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