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UpnComer
Posted: May 12, 20132013-05-12T11:18:25+10:00 2013-05-12T11:18:25+10:00In: Public

A group of friends come across a mysterious abandoned town in the middle of nowhere while on a roadtrip. When they decide to stop and explore, strange things start happening. A burned down school, homes left to rot, and an old asylum have them running from something they can't see. With more questions than answers, will the be able to escape the town, or will they too vanish like the residents of Culberson?

The Back Roads

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    1. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2013-05-13T12:41:04+10:00Added an answer on May 13, 2013 at 12:41 pm

      Not sure who the MC is, would be a good idea to clarify who they are as the protagonist description lacks detail.
      It reads as if this is a multi protagonist story though, by definition this requires all the protagonists to have the same journey. If this is the case it needs clarifying and reasoning by this I mean; why a road trip? A road trip to where? Are they a group of teens out for fun or a group of middle aged people re living their younger days? etc…

      The location will define the characteristics of the story and much needed obstacles “a mysterious abandoned town in the middle of nowhere” is to vague to give a clear understanding of this. At the very least define a country and state so the readers know where they are and assign the required mental images accordingly.

      Just as the MC is vague the AN is vague to (I like using one to define the other) is the bad guy; a ghost? an ancient monster? an angry pagan god? Un like the MC this doesn’t need to be exactly described rather clarified as to give the reader a better idea of the obstacles at hand. Not just the strange things they find like “homes left to rot” rather the force behind them.

      All in all sounds like a relatively good premise for a low budget slasher.

      Hope this helps Nir.

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    2. Richiev Singularity
      2013-05-12T11:50:49+10:00Added an answer on May 12, 2013 at 11:50 am

      “When a stoner philosopher and his friends are mysteriously trapped in an abandoned town, they must discover what befell the residents if they are to escape the same fate.”

      I tried shortening it a little, I added “Stoner Philosopher” but you should change it to reflect the characteristics of your lead character.

      Hope that helps, good luck with this!

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