Losers
A modern day comedic love story where the immature, yet charming, Oscar Cohen struggles when he must decide between his relationship with his childhood friends, and pursuing the woman of his dreams.
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For me, I am struggling with the significance of Oscar’s characteristics and his decision. I understand the ultimate objective, but not the challenge of achieving it. One suggestion might be to leave out the decision he has to make between his friends and the woman of his dreams. If the decision between his friends and the woman is important, I don’t get why out of this logline.
Also, it is hard to understand if this is a teenage or adult movie given that you have listed the characteristic of the main character as immature.
From your title, I see this as a movie about a standout kid in a group of losers who wants to pursue the girl of his dreams but not lose his friends over her.
Hope this helps.
If a story takes place in modern times you don’t have to say modern day, it is assumed.
When a social misfit meets the woman of his dreams, he must overcome the jealousy of his (loser)-or-(Childhood) friends if he wants the relationship to survive.?
Delete the first thirteen words; unnecessary. Pick an interesting and compelling adjective for your protag, leave out the name (unless he’s famous), and increase the stakes and the goal. Choosing between friends and a girl is not a movie concept; it’s a Thursday afternoon during HS lunch period.
I have to agree about the first thirteen words.
However, one of my favorite movies “About Last Night” is about a couple who’s friends get jealous and try to break them up. A great movie.
I see it all the time, A guy or girl gets in their first real relationship, their friends feel left out and power struggle ensues.
I believe if well written a great subject for a movie.
Well, there you go. Another reason- it’s been done.
Geno Scala (sharkeatingman), judge.
If you want you could add a few specifics, an example would be:
After meeting the woman of his dreams an MMO gamer incurs the wrath of his longtime friends after missing the big raid and now both sides demand he choose between them or lose both.
Of course yours would be different but the theory would be to add a few tidbits to make the story stand out and give it a hook.
Great comment. Thanks.