Penpusher
Posted: 2020-01-27T17:54:31+10:00 In:

After her family is killed, a young woman escapes in order to avoid the same fate only to discover a family secret that will soon have her running back home in order to confront those who hurt her family.

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    2 Reviews

    1. Uberwriter

      The only question I have is, escapes what?

      Running back home doesn’t tell me that was the place she escaped.

      Plus hurt her family seems a weak description for killing.? You could use “those responsible”, saves words.

      I look forward to reading a rewrite is you post one.

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    2. Singularity

      “When she discovers the secret of who murdered her family, a (young woman) does the one thing she’s vowed to never do, go back home, to get revenge on those who took away everything from her and her loved ones.”

      I put “Young Woman” in parenthesis because it needs to be changed, What is her personality, who is she, give a two or three-word description of the character.

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