Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
bekiLogliner
Posted: December 26, 20172017-12-26T15:48:09+10:00 2017-12-26T15:48:09+10:00In: Crime

pls comment on it

tittle:_? impenetrable? the desperate high school teacher kidnap his student and ask her family huge amount of money for his only daughter for cancer diagnosis

  • 0
  • 8 8 Reviews
  • 832 Views
  • 0 Followers
  • 0
Share
  • Facebook

    Post a review
    Cancel reply

    You must login to add an answer.

    Forgot Password?

    To see everything, Sign Up Here

    8 Reviews

    • Voted
    • Oldest
    • Recent
    1. Best Answer
      wind Logliner
      2018-01-03T13:20:16+10:00Added an answer on January 3, 2018 at 1:20 pm

      why “impenetrable”?

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    2. Best Answer
      Neer Shelter Singularity
      2018-01-02T16:59:27+10:00Added an answer on January 2, 2018 at 4:59 pm

      Anti-heroes are tough, when done well they’re great because they’re rare but otherwise, more often than not, they fail to engage an audience.

      You would have to work extra hard to set up an otherwise hopeless situation so that his crime is seen, by the audience, as doing the wrong thing for the right reason. I should know, just finished directing a short I wrote about a guy doing the wrong thing for the right reasons.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    3. Best Answer
      dpg Singularity
      2018-01-01T01:28:00+10:00Added an answer on January 1, 2018 at 1:28 am

      An audience may sympathize with the teacher’s dramatic problem, but I doubt they will sympathize with his solution, kidnapping an innocent person for ransom, victimizing one of his own students.

      So the protagonist is, in effect, an anti-hero.? Anti-hero stories are? difficult to pull off.? Vince Gilligan did it quite effectively in? “Breaking Bad”.? I would suggest studying that series, particularly the pilot episode, for how he pulled it off.

      fwiw

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    4. Best Answer
      variable Uberwriter
      2017-12-28T03:28:14+10:00Added an answer on December 28, 2017 at 3:28 am

      Richiev gave me an idea…

      “When his daughter contracts cancer, a desperate teacher kidnaps her rich student only to discover he knows her and chooses to cooperate instead”

      reason: he is fed up of his parent’s *detrimental ways of spending their money…..he saw a better use

      *saving a life is certainly better than throwing expensive wine parties

      A conflict could arise when his parents decide not to pay instead ______________
      possibly end into his parents realising their error and with their generous donation, the successful treatment of her daughter

      everybody’s happy

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    5. Best Answer
      CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2017-12-26T19:23:58+10:00Added an answer on December 26, 2017 at 7:23 pm

      To fund his daughter?s cancer treatment a desperate teacher holds a student from a wealthy family for ransom.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    6. Best Answer
      Richiev Singularity
      2017-12-26T18:01:06+10:00Added an answer on December 26, 2017 at 6:01 pm

      In a logline it?s better, to begin with, what sets the story in motion rather than end with it.

      ?When his daughter contracts cancer, a desperate?teacher??

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    7. Best Answer
      Foxtrot25 Uberwriter
      2017-12-26T17:43:08+10:00Added an answer on December 26, 2017 at 5:43 pm

      You should also mention the word “ransom” in Craigs version, which sounds good.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    8. Best Answer
      CraigDGriffiths Uberwriter
      2017-12-26T16:09:33+10:00Added an answer on December 26, 2017 at 4:09 pm

      Remove the title. Get you back a few words.

      A desperate teacher kidnaps a student from a wealthy family to get money to pay for his daughter?s chemotherapy.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp

    Sidebar

    Stats

    • Loglines 7,997
    • Reviews 32,189
    • Best Reviews 629
    • Users 3,710

    screenwriting courses

    Adv 120x600

    aalan

    Explore

    • Signup

    Footer

    © 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
    With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.