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RichievSingularity
Posted: June 12, 20132013-06-12T19:41:06+10:00 2013-06-12T19:41:06+10:00In: Public

Tired of being hated, a clever rat creates a fake bushy tale to blend with the beloved squirrel's, but must keep up the facade or lose the squirrel of his dreams.

Squirrel of my dreams

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    11 Reviews

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    1. Richiev Singularity
      2013-06-12T19:49:11+10:00Added an answer on June 12, 2013 at 7:49 pm

      Simon the rat has a good life, a couple of true friends and a sweet little bungalow under the stairs. But when he sees how good the Squirrels have it, he gets jealous and creates a fake bushy tail so he can be beloved and given free food at the park.

      He also sees a beautiful squirrel (Milla) who he falls for.

      He’s accepted, but Rick, the leader of the squirrels, is in love with Milla and doesn’t like Simon sniffing around. He is suspicious and determined to prove Simon a fraud.

      Rats are the nerds
      Squirrels are the cool kids.

      In many ways it’s an eighties teen comedy, but with rats and squirrels.

      Not written yet but the concept is there. (Thinking about doing this as a youtube project)

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    2. Jean-Marie Mazaleyrat Penpusher
      2013-06-12T21:29:51+10:00Added an answer on June 12, 2013 at 9:29 pm

      Hi Richie,

      I like it!

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    3. Tony Edward Samurai
      2013-06-12T21:39:42+10:00Added an answer on June 12, 2013 at 9:39 pm

      Hi Richiev,

      It throws up some interesting possibilities — and I’m talking romeo and juliet themes with the whole rat and squirrel cohabitation thing… maybe not what you’re thinking… regardless — youtube project is an awesome idea… and animated obviously?

      Anyway – best of luck.

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    4. Richiev Singularity
      2013-06-13T00:22:02+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 12:22 am

      Thanks Jean

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    5. Richiev Singularity
      2013-06-13T00:22:47+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 12:22 am

      Hey Tony, I never even thought of Romeo and Juliet, interesting take.

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    6. dpg Singularity
      2013-06-13T02:01:48+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 2:01 am

      Suggested title: Squirrely

      Tony Edwards is spot on that can have a Romeo & Juliet love problem. But it’s kind of kinky, Richiev for a rat to fall in love with a squirrel! 🙂 On the other foot, you could have a love problem based upon mistaken identity: a squirrel falls in love with the rat passing as a squirrel. That configuration of the love story might create more dramatic tension, increase the risk of the rat being outed (See “Ratatouille”).

      Whatever. Love the concept!

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    7. dpg Singularity
      2013-06-13T02:29:46+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 2:29 am

      Richiev:

      My initial response was to the logline — a good sign for the general premise.

      But after reading your synopsis, I would like to suggest that you rethink the status quo.

      I think the decision to pass as a squirrel would work better in terms of motivation if Simon isn’t living the good life. Rather, the status quo for him is a Hobbesian existence, solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short. He’s living a ratty life where he faces one damn threat and aggravation after another: rat poison, traps, screaming humans, etc.

      It’s his ratty life compared to the “good life” of the squirrels that plants the crazy solution in his mind and pushes him over the threshold.

      Or you could double up on the motivation for him to cross the threshold with a carrot [love] and stick [jeopardy]. (Although I prefer the love story arising out of mistaken identity. It would kick in after he crosses the threshold.)

      fwiw

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    8. Richiev Singularity
      2013-06-13T03:14:37+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 3:14 am

      I see your point dpg, and since it isn’t written yet, I can make changes.

      The story is; Simon doesn’t appreciate what he has. He thinks the grass is greener on the other side.

      His internal journey begins when he believes life would be better as a squirrel and ends when he realizes he should just be himself.

      However, your idea does “Up the ante.” Making life harder for Simon in the beginning of the story would contrast the “Cushy” life of a squirrel.

      Great feedback!

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    9. Valerie Bass
      2013-06-13T08:35:41+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 8:35 am

      Love where this is going. Great longline!

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    10. 2013-06-13T09:54:06+10:00Added an answer on June 13, 2013 at 9:54 am

      Great Idea, got my attention, lot of promise in the premise. some questions to consider as it sounds like your still in outline stage.

      Just remember if you go the romeo & juliet lovers route, that its you’ll need to distinguish it from Pepe Le Pew. ‘my darling’

      inter-species love is always a tricky one to pull off to feel plausible (all the way to the end), so besides the tail, what is it about the two characters that draws them together. (when that love is broken what does the hero overcome to bring it all back together just as a himself a rat?)

      Is it romantic love or plutonic (think bee movie). when does it get creepy.

      who hates him, his own kind or humans? (why is that important?)

      what is the hero journey, is it avatar like where he must choose to be or the other, what obstacles does he have to overcome to be accepted by squirrels.

      Is there a bigger problem that affect both rats and squirrels that he must unite them in to over come… say something in central park??

      good luck.

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    11. why.kim
      2013-06-14T15:18:01+10:00Added an answer on June 14, 2013 at 3:18 pm

      Nice logline, seems like it would be a good pixar/disney type movie! Would definitely be interested to hear more of this.

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