A family man is one day abducted by the people in the future to be send as a reinforcements for the losing war in the future. He came back 16 years after on the day he was abducted and faces the life he left behind.

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6 reviews

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

When a man returns after 16 years of time traveling, he struggles to change the present to avoid the terrible future he has seen for himself -- and all humanity.

[Note: the hook of the movie is time travel. If that future isn't the prime driver of both the plot and the character in the present, it's a throw away plot gimmick.]

Valentin · Mentor · 3,580 pts

When a family man reappears 16 years after being zapped into the future to take place in a galactic war, he struggles to readjust to his new surrounding and rebuild relationships with his ex-wife and his resentful children.

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

>>I think that the problem is that the back story is more intriguing than the front story.
>> you need to connect his current problems with what happen to him in the past and future.

I agree.

Valentin · Mentor · 3,580 pts

I think that the problem is that the back story is more intriguing than the front story.
War in the future against dealing with the aftermath of the disappearance and reappearance 15 years later of that family man. If you don't intend to show what happen to him in the future, just make him a soldier who disappeared for all these years. Was he a prisoner, amnesic?
If you want to keep the concept of being zapped into the future to take place in a galactic war, one way to solve the problem would be to mix both elements into a s?rie be TV, web or comic book.
Each episode deals with a problem created by the reappearance of the hero. Put that problem with flashback (before the departure) and forward flashback (what happen to him in the future to exacerbate/cancel the problem).
For example, his wife may have painted him as the bad guy in their perfect marriage, but then the flashback shows that that was not the reality. She had cheated on him. She accuses him of faking his disappearance, never wanting kids and not understanding the responsibility of fatherhood. The forward flashback reveals that in the future he acted as a surrogate father for some kids zapped into the future.

In order to make it more inter connected, you could have the zapping of people from the past necessary because they are needed for genetic reasons. Maybe the hero learned that some terrible event will occur and he can't stop it. Or maybe he knows that his son will be zapped into the future and he tries to teach him necessary skills pre-emptively but the kids refuses. Also he may suffer from PTSD. Maybe He is unable to readjust to today's technology.

I can see so many potential in that idea, but like I said you need to connect his current problems with what happen to him in the past and future.

LS Richards · Penpusher · 65 pts

Ditto dpg: there's an interesting idea in there, that a future world is so devastated it needs to go back in time for cannon fodder, but it's buried in vague writing. You've also got some words that are just wrong: it's "sent" not "send," and if it's one man, then he wouldn't be "reinforcements." In the second line the past-tense "came" should be the present-tense "comes."

dogger · Singularity · 87,055 pts

What's the main story? Being hijacked to the future to fight a war sound more interesting than returning to the present? (Or is this the premise for a franchise, several movies [or episodes in a TV series] about what happens in the future -- the consequences in the present?)