A military school cadet must be silenced when she witnesses Cuban-Americans robbing the school’s armory. When she discovers that the guns are to be used to assassinate the president, she has only minutes to stop the killers.

Reviewing the several iterations of the logline, it occurs to me that the aspect of special interest to the author seems to be not the conspiracy, per se, but the protagonist -- it's a woman in a (mostly) male environment. I'm all for more strong protagonist roles for women -- it's scandalous how few there are -- but I'm not sure this is a robust enough plot vehicle for such a character.

Reviewing the several iterations of the logline, it occurs to me that the aspect of special interest to the author seems to be not the conspiracy, per se, but the protagonist -- it's a woman in a (mostly) male environment. I'm all for more strong protagonist roles for women -- it's scandalous how few there are -- but I'm not sure this is a robust enough plot vehicle for such a character.

And get caught by a cadet no less...

If they are caught by a cadet, how would they sneak by the secret service?

This logline seams to try and mould a premise into a possible situation but not probable, credible or believable in any way and struggling at that.

As for the logline itself if the story is about the cadet then why does the logline start off with an event that is an observation made by the antagonists and not the MC's inciting incident?

Hope this helps.