Yes, being “half-human” is a bit different from being “nothos” because the character is actually half-human, half-nothos, which is probably how it should be phrased in the logline if I decide to stick with that terminology. The character is also male, as is the agent. However, I don’t see any convenient way to include that–or really any need to?

So, the most current logline–based on suggestions from here, and from my college instructor–is:

The government struggles to contain a new mutant species, the Homo nothos (false man), while one of its young federal agents falls for its most nefarious threat: a charming half-human, half-nothos crime boss.

The humans in this story aren’t being genetically engineered. Rather the “new human species” begins during WWII when the bombing of Hiroshima causes a strain of the rabies virus to mutate. The virus targets humans and is basically just a more aggressive form of rabies. The first few attempts at a cure fail and actually cause the virus to mutate further until permanent changes are made to the DNA code in the patients’ reproductive cells. Which means that the mutations are passed to the offspring. To shorten the rest of the explanation, enough of the criteria is eventually met to qualify the inheritable mutations as a new species of human. (And yes, I have done my research into virus mutations and vaccines and this could actually work, at least up to this point. :D)

Carriers of the mutation are basically human. The differences lay mainly in heightened senses and the ability to shift from human to wolf form.

The new species is called Homo nothos (just nothos for short), which means “false man.”

Early on in the discovery of the inheritable nature of the mutation, it was thought that a cure could be made for those people. A organization was established to protect the carriers, while working to develop a cure. However, no cure is possible and the organization, the Homo Nothos Registry (shortened to the Registry), soon morphed into an Internationally Federated presence that has misinformed the public about the nature of the nothos to assist in keeping the nothos contained and controlled for the Registry’s own purposes. The Registry is not wholly horrible, but like most government forces, it has many dark spots.

The story of Lies Told follows a young Registry officer, Rove, who makes the mistake of forming first a business relationship, and then a romantic one, with a half-human, half-nothos crime boss named Lux. There are of course other characters that have important story lines as well, all of which push the officer toward his end game plot but the focus is on Rove and Lux.

Since this is for television, the genre is more of a procedural crime drama with a heavy dose of fantasy (much like Grimm). Show loglines aren’t as specific as those for film, but instead fairly broad. A classmate at my film school suggested this:

Crime drama meets mythology in this science fiction take on a world gone mad. The Registry struggles to contain a new human species while one of its young agents falls for its most nefarious threat: a charming half-human crime boss.

Which I like (barring the phrase “take on a world gone mad” since the world hasn’t really “gone mad”) especially that second sentence which captures more of the essence of the show. Eventually the Registry would be taken down, but the main story is that of the officer and the crime boss, so that is where the focus of the logline should lay. However, I’m still not sure if it’s enough of a hook.

Thoughts on all of this?